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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24479668">Hold me while you wait</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Luna_12/pseuds/Luna_12'>Luna_12</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>A little bit of angst, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Artist Clarke Griffin, Bellarke, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, I Don't Even Know, Idiots in Love, M/M, Rating May Change, Romance, Slow Burn, Teacher Bellamy Blake, but not so slow, just so much fluff</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 03:13:34</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>36,744</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24479668</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Luna_12/pseuds/Luna_12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Clarke is trying to let people in after some events that changed her life drastically.<br/>In comes Bellamy Blake, new in town with an easy smile and a story of his own, and he is willing to help her get through it all, without even knowing her.</p><p>Will she finally open up and let someone in?<br/>Will that someone be Bellamy Blake?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Bellamy Blake/Clarke Griffin, John Murphy/Raven Reyes, Octavia Blake/Lincoln</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>77</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hey folks!</p><p>This is my first fic ever so be good to me.<br/>I'll try to update regularly, but it's a work in progress, so I can't promise anything.</p><p>Hope you all enjoy it!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It all started on a Tuesday morning.<br/>
<br/>
Clarke, as always, was on her way to the café owned by two of her oldest friends, Monty and Jasper, for her morning and absolutely needed cup of coffee. Even in her morning state of coma induced by lack of caffeine, entering the café always put a sense of tranquility in Clarke's bones, maybe for the welcoming atmosphere of the place build so meticulously by two of the people she cares about the most, maybe because of the two said people smiling faces that greeted her first thing every morning.<br/>
<br/>
"Hey Clarkey!" erupted Jasper as always, at the same time Monty, already preparing her so much needed cup of coffee (thank god for him), smiled at her with a simple but still heartfelt " 'Morning, Clarke".<br/>
<br/>
"Hey guys, how is it going?" She asked, thanking Jas with a silent smile for the muffin he put in front of her.<br/>
<br/>
"Oh, you know, a normal Tuesday for now. After the waves of clients that brings the morning it will be slow going until tonight." said Monty handing her a steaming cup of coffee.<br/>
<br/>
"Ah, yeah, karaoke night." she answered, taking a big gulp.<br/>
<br/>
"Will you be there this time Clarkey? Pretty please?" asked Jasper, imploring her with his big pleading eyes.<br/>
<br/>
Thankfully, she was saved from answering from her ringing phone "Hey Rae."<br/>
<br/>
"Good morning my grumpy and oh so late friend!"<br/>
<br/>
"Well, I wasn't grumpy until 2 seconds ago." she answered already piking up her muffin. "And I am not late."<br/>
<br/>
"You always are, 'cause I'm always early." Clarke rolled her eyes at that, but Raven wasn't done. "Get your ass over here Griffin, and bring coffee!"<br/>
<br/>
She shot an exasperated look at Monty and Jasper who were looking at her with amused faces. "I'll bring you your damn coffee, Reyes, always so demanding!" Clarke heard Raven laughing right before hanging up.<br/>
<br/>
"Can you guys also give me a -" Clarke was cut off by Jasper handing her a second "Cup of coffee for Raven?" he said. "Done."<br/>
<br/>
"My angel!"<br/>
<br/>
"Hey, what am I?" said Monty shooting her a hurtful look.<br/>
<br/>
"Oh Monty, you are my angel too!" answered Clarke blowing him a kiss while putting a ten dollar bill in the tip jar.</p><p><br/>
As soon as they finally decided to go through with their dream of opening a coffee shop here in Arkadia, Jasper and Monty came to Clarke asking for her help to put into the walls of the soon to be the best coffee shop in town the universe that was on their mind. And a universe it was: at the time, her friends were obsessed with a post apocalyptic TV show that gave them the idea that, after nearly two months of hard work from Clarke, was now the highlight of the place.</p><p>The mural, that covers the entirety of the café, starts on the ceiling, with a representation of the universe: stars, planets, black holes and everything in between. Looking down from the ceiling to the beginning of the four walls the universe fades bringing space to four types of sky and landscapes, divided by the four walls but at the same time all connected by a play of colors and shades: there is the plain blue sky, that of a sunny day, with birds flying in the air and a lake surrounded by a deep forest; the peaceful sky we see at sunrise, with the sun rising from the peaceful waves of a sea just starting to wake up; the heartwarming sky we see at sunset, with the sun descending in between two mountains, exploding in thousands of colors. Finally, there is the cloudy sky, that of a storm just passed, with rays of sunshine filtering trough the clouds and a beautiful rainbow that reflects on a series of waterfalls. It all comes to a close on the floor, that brings together the four images on the walls in one with a flowery meadow.</p><p>It was amazing, and not because she did it.<br/>
The idea that came from her friends, blew her mind for its powerfullness.<br/>
When she entered the café, every damn time, she could feel all of it. Peace, hope, joy, wonder. It was like, with the visual images that they let her put on the walls, they wanted to say to their future clients "this is for you folks, we know you could have or already had a bad day, but here, in those walls, in this place, you can find peace and quiet, in the form you most like".<br/>
She was amazed by what they managed to accomplish: they created a place that could be home for kids, teen and adults. This was her to go place when she needed inspiration.</p><p>She didn't want to be paid for a work that gave so much to her, but she spent so may days (and nights) on this project, and her friends were so proud of it, that in the end she decided to use it as her final project at Arkadia University.</p><p>Now, nearly four years later, co-owning a gallery with her friend Lincoln and teaching art classes in an extracurricular course at Arkadia High School, people from time to time still showed up at the gallery complimenting her for her work at the coffee shop and asking if they could commission Clarke for a wall in their house or work place. It became a small business of its own, and it was really fun: she found herself painting things she never imagined painting, and, more than that, bringing joy to people without asking anything in return, if not providing the paint she needed. She had enough money with the found her dad left her, plus her art was selling well, and the job at the high school wasn't really necessary but it helped her to occupy her time, and she liked the teens in her class.</p><p>Same thing went for Monty and Jasper. Clarke refused categorically to let them pay her, so, even after her protests, they swore that she would always get whatever she wanted for free in the café. After the opening, Clarke tried for months to pay for her orders in vain. Hence her putting the money in the tip jar.</p><p>Now, Clarke was putting away her money and taking the muffin and the two coffee cups, balancing them in her small hands in addition with her phone that began ringing again and her car keys, "Sorry guys but apparently today I'm in a hurry, love ya!" she said while taking the call and putting on speaker.<br/>
<br/>
"I don't hear the sound of your car Griff!" sang Raven's voice in the other line.<br/>
<br/>
"Clarke, you need a hand with the cups?" Monty asked while he and Jasper exchanged a lough at Raven's tone.</p><p>Balancing the phone on her ear she shot a grateful look to Monty who promptly began coming her way. "Now who's the grumpy one Rae? You called only three minutes ago," Clarke muttered while turning and going in the direction of the door after mouthing a goodbye to Jasper, "I'm on my wa-"</p><p>Monty was opening the door of the café for her at the same time someone was pushing through to enter, thing that Clarke obviously didn't see until she smacked face first into a hard chest. Surprised, she lets go of everything that was in her hands, losing her balance. Result: the remnants of her muffin, phone and car keys on the ground as long as her and Raven's coffee cups, obviously almost empty because nearly the entirety of them was now soaking trough her blouse and presumably the clothes of...</p><p>Two strong hands grabbed Clarke by the waist avoiding her to fall. "Woah there, fuck I didn't see you."</p><p>Clarke's eyes immediately followed the strong arms of the man that just spoke. In the shock of the moment, only a series of things she noted: a blue t-shirt that reflected perfectly the tan skin that belonged to this man with an oh so deep voice, a hard chest that filled said blue t-shirt damn good, and lifting her eyes to look at the unfortunate companion of her morning misadventure, freckles. So many freckles.<em> "It's like watching the stars on the ceiling of the café" </em>she thought, finally locking eyes with him and noting that him too was checking her out. She blushed, averting her gaze hoping he won't see, but his smirk told her everything she needed to know.</p><p>It was Monty who brought them back to reality "Shit, Clarke, I'm sorry, I should have seen someone was coming!"<br/>
<br/>
She shook her head, "It's not your fault Monty, I was on the phone and didn't check the door."<br/>
<br/>
It was the mention of her phone (but mostly Raven's voice) that finally snapped her out of her daze. "Clarke? What happened? You all right?" <br/>
<br/>
Clarke tried to ignore the electricity that she felt running trough her since the mysterious man steadied her and composed herself, finally stepping out of his arms. She also tried to ignore the cold she suddenly felt at the loss of his arms around her... <em>Anyway.</em><br/>
<br/>
"Yeah, I'm fine Rae, I'm on my way." Clarke was saying to Raven while collecting her phone and car keys on the floor and ending the call.<br/>
<br/>
"Clarke, we have a t-shirt of the café that you can borrow if you want to change." Jasper was saying, emerging from the back door.<br/>
<br/>
Clarke smiled gratefully at him. "See, an angel!" she said taking the garment from him and putting it in her purse, "I really have to go, I'm so sorry for all the trouble."<br/>
<br/>
"What? Don't worry Clarkey, it's all right." answered Monty with an easy smile, "Everything ok, man?"</p><p><br/>
It was at that moment that Clarke realized that the man that she bumped into was still planted in the doorway of the café, arms outstretched where he was holding her only moments earlier, still watching her. She blushed all over again.<br/>
He seemed to finally register Monty's words, shaking his head and bringing a hand up to scratch the back of his neck in what seemed a nervous gesture. For her part, it only brought attention to his unruly curls. "Yeah, yes, everything's fine," he stuttered, "I am the one who should apologize." he said looking at all of them.<br/>
<br/>
At that Jasper laughed and patted him on the arm. "No way man, it happens, coffee on the house, you too Clarkey." <br/>
<br/>
"Next time guys, you know Reyes, she can't wait for shit, I have to hurry!" Clarke said to her friends, but was already looking at the mysterious man. "I'm sorry for all of this, I can pay you a new shirt."<br/>
<br/>
He seemed taken aback by her finally addressing him, but quickly recovered "Nah, the fault here is all mine." <br/>
<br/>
"If you are sure…"<br/>
<br/>
"Sure." he reassured her with an easy smile.<br/>
<br/>
"Ok then, this time I'm really going." Clarke said to all of them, starting for the door, only to slip again thanks for the coffee still on the floor.<br/>
And again mysterious man saved her from a free fall. "Ok, this isn't my day," Clarke muttered stepping away from him and staring at the floor, "that's embarrassing." she continued.<br/>
The man chuckled, <em>he chuckled</em>. <br/>
<br/>
"At your service, princess."<br/>
<br/>
She snapped her gaze to him, shocked, and saw the same shock reflecting in his eyes, like he himself couldn't believe what he said.<br/>
<br/>
Once again, it was her phone ringing loudly that saved them from saying something. "I am killing her." She huffed. "Well, it was a pleasure, I am sorry, thank you for saving me again, guys give him a muffin, a cake, whatever the hell he wants, it's on me, and I am paying this time, have I already said thank you for saving me?" Clarke said all in a rush, looking at Mr. Freckles. <br/>
<br/>
"You did, and you don't have to pay for nothing, if anything I should -"<br/>
<br/>
"Well guys this is cute and all but Clarkey, Reyes is waiting for you and I assume you," pointing at the guy "have a job or something, a life to live maybe?" Monty asked.<br/>
<br/>
The man scratched the back of his neck, again. It was starting to get distracting. "Uh, yeah..." He seemed at a loss of words.<br/>
<br/>
Giving up on having an answer from hot guy Monty turned and gave her an expectant look. "I am going!" She said already walking out the door, sidestepping her savior and giving him a faint smile. "Really, thank you, and sorry." She said walking to her car. If he answered, she didn't hear him, Raven already talking a mile a minute in her ear "Clarke Griffin where the hell are you? It's a ten-minute drive from the coffee shop, with traffic! Are you a snail or something?"<br/>
<br/>
"I know, I know Rae I am sorry, but I ran into a hot guy and spilled our coffees on him and me and then slipped, two times, and he caught me, <em>two times</em>, it was really embarrassing. I am starting the car, be there soon." Clarke finally let out a breath she didn't know she was holding.<br/>
<br/>
Barely ten minutes later she pulled up at Raven's place, the beautiful brunette already waiting for her.<br/>
<br/>
"Nice shirt." She said getting in the car. "Where's my coffee?"<br/>
<br/>
"Exactly here." Clarke said pointing at the stain on her damp blouse. "I should change before going." She continued, already pulling out of her purse the shirt Jasper gave her.<br/>
During the short minute that took Clarke to change her shirt Raven watched her with a calculating look. <br/>
<br/>
All it took was Clarke starting her car for Raven finally bursting "A HOT GUY?!"<br/>
<em><br/>
Here we go</em>, Clarke thought.<br/>
Raven was already pulling out her phone, probably to write a message to Jasper and Monty. "Don't be so quiet Griffin, spill, I need details!"<br/>
<br/>
"There isn't really much to say Rae, he was hot, and now he is gone."<br/>
<br/>
"You don't know that."<br/>
<br/>
"Well, now I just want to find a present for Harper, can we focus, please?"<br/>
<br/>
Raven gave her a sympathetic look. "Hey, you know I am on your side, uh? But you'll have to let someone in, sooner or later."<br/>
<br/>
She let out a breath. "I know, I just... It's early to make plans. I only said that he's hot, and he is. But, other than that, I don't know him. I don't even know his name Rae. Just... just let it go for now, please?" She asked her friend.<br/>
<br/>
Raven nodded and squeezed her leg in understanding. <br/>
<br/>
The rest of the ride was silent, Raven occupied with her phone and Clarke lost in her own head.<br/>
They got to the mall and found the sunglasses that Harper was eyeing for months, and bought them. They were going to give them to her at her birthday party on Saturday.<br/>
Then, they grabbed a quick lunch and wandered around the mall in search of everything and nothing for a couple of hours. <br/>
On Tuesdays, she was teaching at the High School, so on those days Clarke usually refrained herself to go to the gallery, if not for emergencies.  <br/>
<br/>
It was only when she got home later that day after the lesson that she had a minute to check her phone, only to find a string of texts in her group chat with all her friends.<br/>
<br/>
<strong>"The Dropship folks"</strong></p><p><strong>Rae 9:36am:<br/>
</strong>@JAS @MONTY Griff met a HOT GUY?</p><p><strong>Jackson 9:36am:</strong><br/>
NO WAY<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Harp 9:37am:<br/>
</strong>We need details<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Jas 9:41am:<br/>
</strong>It was soooooo cute! they walked into each other and kept staring at each other and there was coffee everywhere and then Clarkey slipped TWICE and he steadied her TWICE and I am organizing the wedding already<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Monty 9:42am:<br/>
</strong>Breathe Jasper. But yeah... it was cute.<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Linc 9:45am:<br/>
</strong>I am assuming you are betting on it already...<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Jas 9:46am:<br/>
</strong>OBVS<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Linc 9:48am:<br/>
</strong>In that case, I'm in. <br/>
Sorry Griffin<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Jackson 9:53am:<br/>
</strong>IN<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Harp 9:55am:<br/>
</strong>Me, too!<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Rae 10:11am:<br/>
</strong>Guys, she doesn't even know his name...<br/>
Fuck it, count me in<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Monty 10:23am:<br/>
</strong>Well, he certainly knows her name, and we know his, but we aren't going to say anything 'cause they are going to figure their shit out without our help, aren't they, Jas?<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Monty 10:28am:<br/>
</strong>JASPER.<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Jas 10:29am:</strong><br/>
I'm literally in front of u maaan!<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Monty 10:29am:</strong><br/>
And yet you aren't answering.<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Jas 10:30am:</strong><strong><br/>
</strong>Fine, FINE!! I'm not going to say anything... Ya know, I really don't know why you all keep making me promise things when ya know that I can't keep a secret for shit<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Linc 10:30am:<br/>
</strong>I was asking myself the same thing.<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Jas 10:31am:<br/>
</strong>But I'll try<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Jas 10:32am:<br/>
</strong>I swear<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Jas 10:33am:<br/>
</strong>You can count on me this time guys<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p><p>Unbelievable. So much for letting it go, thanks, Raven.<br/>
She was still staring at the group chat when her phone chirped with an incoming text from Raven.</p><p><strong>Rae 16:56pm:<br/>
</strong>I assume by now you had a minute to read the group chat... I am sorry, it all started before our talk, couldn't really take it back.<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Clarke 16:58pm:</strong><br/>
It's fine Rae, I imagined, don't worry.<br/>
Better starting the conversation with your input than Jasper's.<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Rae 16:59pm:<br/>
</strong>Ah! Yeah, he was hyperventilating.<br/>
Still sorry, tough.<br/>
Love ya<br/>
<br/>
She typed a quick reply to her friend and then switched to the group chat.<br/>
<br/>
</p><p><strong>"The Dropship folks"<br/>
<br/>
</strong><strong>Clarke 17:01pm:<br/>
</strong>I hate you all.<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Jas 17:02pm:<br/>
</strong>HIS NAME IS BELLAMY BLAKE</p><p><strong>Jackson 17:02pm:<br/>
</strong>WTF<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Monty 17:02pm:<br/>
</strong>JASPER!<strong><br/>
<br/>
Harp 17:03pm:<br/>
</strong>Unbelievable.<strong><br/>
<br/>
</strong><strong>Rae 17:05pm:</strong><br/>
So believable!<br/>
<br/>
<strong>Linc 17:10pm:<br/>
</strong>Called it<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Well... That went well.<br/>
<br/>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Bellamy left The Dropship with renewed energy that morning. And a little dazed too, but he was trying to ignore that.<br/>
<br/>
He was in town since Sunday, and he already managed to know new people, find the coffee shop of his dreams and bump into a girl that stole his breath awa-<br/>
<em>Ok Bellamy, focus.</em></p><p>He entered his new home and found Murphy already waiting for him at the kitchen counter.<br/>
"Well thank fuck man, I was dying here!" complained Murphy.</p><p>"Remind me why I accepted to live with you?" Bellamy asked, ducking quickly in the bathroom to change his dump shirt with a clean one.</p><p>" 'Cause I am your best and only friend in this town, maybe?"</p><p>“I like Miller more.” Bellamy replied, back in the kitchen.</p><p>“You know Miller thanks to me.” Murphy said in an annoyed tone.</p><p>"That’s beside the point."</p><p>"Well, enlighten me then."</p><p>Bellamy smirked. "Well, I'll have you know, that while wandering around in search of your breakfast I found a coffee shop and I got acquainted with the two owners."</p><p>Murphy's face was unimpressed. "Really."</p><p>"Of course. So much so, that they offered me the coffees and even a cake." Bellamy said proudly.</p><p>Murphy snickered. "Look at you, so proud of yourself. Grumpy old man took a step forward today." </p><p>Bellamy flipped him off. “Where’s O?”<br/>
<br/>
“Shower.” Replied Murphy while accepting the cup of coffee Bellamy handed to him. “Oh, you found The Dropship?”</p><p>“Yes. You know the place?”</p><p>“Man, I am in this town for nearly six months now. I know the place. And I know Monty and Jasper as well.”</p><p>“Yeah?”</p><p>Murphy hummed. “We went to school together.”</p><p>Bellamy looked at him in false surprise. “You went to school?”</p><p>“Ha, funny.”</p><p>Bellamy chuckled. “But seriously, why aren’t them in your friend’s circle?”</p><p>Murphy considered his reply. “I don’t really know. I was away for years and after my departure we lost contact. Once I was back, first there was the moving in with Emori, and then the break up with Emori… in addiction to that, I was kind of a dick back in the day.“</p><p>“Surprising.” Bellamy muttered.</p><p>Murphy nodded. “Yeah well, thinking back the only reason we all went out together was Clarke.” <br/>
<br/>
Bellamy almost fell of the chair he was seating into. His eyes snapped to Murphy’s. “Who?”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>Bellamy huffed. “What did you just say?”</p><p>“Nothing important, just a walk down memory lane.”</p><p>Unable to find a way to bring up the subject without giving anything away Bellamy let the conversation go.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
But it was too late. His mind was already running a mile a minute.<br/>
Murphy knew Clarke? Were they friends? Are they? Why he never mentioned her? Maybe he had, only Bellamy wasn’t paying attention.</p><p>And why was he already so affected by her?<br/>
Their interaction lasted five minutes give or take, and they didn’t even talk. Damn, he didn’t even tell her his name. Thinking back to it, he only stood there watching her like a moron.<br/>
The feel of her so soft in his hands, her ocean eyes that captured his in an instant, only to be drawn away when she bit on her lip, letting him fixate on the mole just above her lip-</p><p>Bellamy snapped out of it hearing Murphy’s voice. “What’s with the face?”</p><p>“What face?”</p><p>“Your face.”</p><p>“I don’t have a face.” <em>Damn, what a reply Bellamy.</em></p><p>Murphy seemed unaffected. “Duh, you have. And It’s the “I’m lost thinking about a girl” face.”</p><p>“Good morning, big brother!” Octavia interrupted, entering the kitchen and giving Bellamy a kiss on the cheek. “And Murphy.” She added.</p><p>Murphy was still eyeing Bellamy though, who blew out a breath in relief. <em>Perfect timing, Octavia.</em></p><p>But apparently Octavia wasn’t on his side today. She sat at the counter and, after taking her cup of coffee and a slice of pie she said “Ok Bell, spill.”</p><p>Bellamy looked at her in confusion. “Uh?”</p><p>Octavia leveled him with an unimpressed look. “Don’t even try to pretend big brother, you have your “I met a girl and am hung up on her already” face on, so just explain already.”</p><p>At that, Murphy busted out laughing. “Told ya.”</p><p> </p><p>Bellamy didn’t know what to say. Was he this easy to read?<br/>
He sighed, putting his head on the counter.</p><p>Octavia patted his back. “Oh don’t worry Bell, only me and Murphy know that face.”<br/>
<br/>
“And Miller.” added Murphy.</p><p>Octavia nodded. “Yes, probably him too.”<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy lifted his head, covering his face with his hands. “That’s reassuring.”<br/>
<br/>
Not hearing anything in reply, he moved his hands from his face only to find two pair of eyes looking at him expectantly. “There’s no going out of this, is there?”</p><p>“NO!” They both cheered while munching their pie.</p><p>“I swear, It’s like living with two children.” Bellamy muttered under his breath. "I may have met a girl." He finally let out.</p><p>Octavia nearly spilled her coffee throwing her hands in the air. "I knew it!"</p><p>"We bumped into each other really. She spilled her coffee on me and when she slipped, I saved her."</p><p>"Romantic." Octavia chuckled.</p><p>But it was Murphy's comment that affected him most. "It's Clarke, uh?"</p><p>Bellamy stared at him in shock.</p><p>"Who's Clarke?" Jumped in Octavia.</p><p>"Anyone." Answered Bellamy quickly, at the same time Murphy muttered "The girl your brother's in love with." </p><p>"I'm not in love with her!" busted out Bellamy.</p><p>"Don't even try that with me Bellamy, I noted your dreamy eyes since you put foot in the door." <br/>
<br/>
Bellamy rolled his eyes.<br/>
He couldn't really reply to that, so instead he decided to ask what was bugging him since Murphy mentioned Clarke earlier. "How do you know her?"</p><p>"She was in school with me, too." He replied, annoyed.</p><p>"And you lost contact with her like you did with Monty and Jasper?"</p><p>Murphy stared him down. "Actually, we are pretty great friends."</p><p>"You never mentioned her." Bellamy said cautiously. His friend was clearly irritated. Why, he didn't know.</p><p>Murphy huffed. "Actually I did. Maybe you thought she was a dude? Anyway, I don't tell you everything about my life."</p><p>Ok, obviously there was something going on. He opened his mouth to reply but Octavia beat him to it. "Why are you being a dick Murphy?"</p><p>Well, he couldn't have said it better.<br/>
<br/>
</p><p>Murphy stared at them for a long moment, and then he put his hands up, sighing. "I'm sorry."</p><p>Bellamy's eyes nearly bulged out of his head at that, but again, Octavia beat him to reply. "Have I heard that right? John Murphy? Apologizing? Is heaven burning down or something?" she shot out.</p><p>Bellamy chuckled. "Calm down O, let him explain."</p><p>Murphy drummed his fingers on the counter a few times, then clapped his hands. "All right, let's just say that sometimes, when I feel the need to protect someone, my overprotective stake gets a little too high."</p><p>Bellamy, again, was shocked. "Overprotective?"</p><p>"You know, that thing you always do with your sister when you want to protect her even if she doesn't need you to?" Murphy said dryly.</p><p>"True, but you are still being a dick Murphy." Interjected Octavia, shooting him an angry look.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Murphy took a long pull of coffee, giving himself a few seconds to calm down. "Ok, I'm going to pull it all out. But please, don't take this the wrong way, ok?" </p><p>Bellamy narrowed his eyes. "What that's supposed to mean?"</p><p>"It means that she was my friend first. And I remember that you weren't supposed to move here alone."</p><p>"Murphy, I literally just met her. And what has Echo got to do with this? We broke up months ago."</p><p>"You really gave up on trying to convince her to move here with you three weeks ago." Murphy said, deadly serious. "Look," he continued "I'm not saying you can't see her. You are my best friend, I know you are one of the good ones. If you want to know her, I'm ok with it. If you fall in love with her, that's good, I think that you could be the right person for her and that she could be the same to you. And if you are sure about what you want, then go for it. But Clarke has a troubled past. And you just broke up with your girlfriend. All I am saying is, make sure that chapter of your life is closed once and for all, 'cause if you hurt her, you and I are gonna have a problem. Simple as that."</p><p>Bellamy considered that for a long moment.</p><p>Sensing he wasn't going to receive an answer soon Murphy addressed Bellamy once again. "Is that clear?" </p><p>Bellamy nodded, still trying to put a sense to what Murphy told him.</p><p>In the meantime, Murphy stood from his chair and put his empty cup in the trashcan. As he passed Bellamy to leave the kitchen, he stopped and squeezed his arm. "I don't want you to be angry at me about this, man. I can see that you are interested in her, and believe me when I say I am happy about it. You two could be good for each other. But be sure to be a hundred per cent in if you decide to try this, that's all I'm asking. And I am not only saying this because of Clarke, but because you are my friend too. I don't want you to go after her only to fill the hole Echo left. You should think about it."</p><p>With that, he left.</p><p>Bellamy let a moment pass, then he looked at his sister, sensing she had something to say as well.<br/>
And he wasn't wrong. <br/>
<br/>
"You know," she started "he may be a dick, but he cares about you. And he is right. I know you Bell, when you are invested in something, you go all in. I'm not saying you are already head over heels for this girl, because you don't really know anything about her. But it's clear you are invested in this. So, as he said, don't jump into it head first and without considering what you want out of it, 'cause if you do, you aren't only going to hurt her, but yourself too."</p><p>Bellamy nodded. They knew him well. "I know O, and I know where Murphy's coming from. I'll be cautious, I promise."</p><p>Octavia leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. "Good boy. Now, let's talk about lunch!"</p><p>"You just finished your breakfast!"</p><p>She winked at him. "So? I'm always hungry!" <br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Hours later, while he was preparing to leave, Murphy knocked on his door. "Hey man, I am here to check on you."</p><p>Bellamy laughed. "Yeah, I was waiting on you."</p><p>"You all right?" Murphy asked, sitting on his bed.</p><p>"Sincerely, I'm still trying to process all of this. Who could have thought you had all that in you?"</p><p>This time, it was Murphy who laughed. "Right?"</p><p>Bellamy nodded. "I've never seen you be like that for anyone, not even Emori back then."</p><p>"Well, Emori didn't need to be protected."</p><p>Bellamy sat on the bed as well. "You don't need to protect Clarke, either. I mean it. I really don't know how things will proceed between us. But I want you to know that you can trust me on this. I'll not rush things. I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable. Also, I may have ended things with Echo just weeks back, but I stopped loving her a long time ago. And you know that. I tried to… make things work… because I didn't want to lose anyone else. I should have-"</p><p>Murphy interrupted him. "Hey man, stop, I know it. I wasn't trying to attack you. And I don't want you to bring it all up again. Just know that I never liked her."</p><p>Bellamy rolled his eyes. "Yes, you made that pretty clear early on."</p><p>Murphy smirked. "And I was right."</p><p>Bellamy punched him in the shoulder. "That you were."</p><p>"Ouch, man! I'm never going to be nice to you, ever again."</p><p>"Well, now I am hurt."</p><p>"You really aren't."</p><p>They looked at each other for a moment.</p><p>Then, Murphy jumped up from the bed. "So, the real reason I came in here was to say good luck for your first day of work."</p><p>Bellamy smiled. "Thanks."</p><p>"You nervous?"</p><p>"Nah." He replied fiddling with his shirt.</p><p>"Clearly. Come on, you have nothing to worry about." Reassured Murphy, clapping him on the back and starting for the door.</p><p>"If you say so. Thanks, Murphy. See you tonight."</p><p>"See ya."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
The lesson went well. <br/>
Extremely well, if he has to say so himself.<br/>
The students seemed eager to learn about a matter that he loves, so like Murphy said, he didn't have to worry.<br/>
Some of them even stopped by his desk at the end of the lecture to ask him some more questions.<br/>
Bellamy was relieved.</p><p>When he received the call from Principal Jaha, Bellamy was ecstatic.<br/>
He was teaching first-graders at the time, and while he liked the job, he couldn't refuse an opportunity like that. The plan was to start the new job with the beginning of the school year, in September. Then, in March, Principal Jaha called him again saying that due to health issues, Professor Wollace, that Bellamy was supposed to replace, had to retire early. He begged Bellamy to start as soon as possible. What was he supposed to do?<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p><p>As he wandered through the empty alleys of the high school, trying to settle, he heard voices coming from just around the corner.<br/>
Probably the extracurricular courses, Bellamy thought. <br/>
Principal Jaha talked to him about them. He even asked him to teach one. Bellamy politely declined. It was April, the school year was coming to a close, the only thing Bellamy wanted to do now was getting to know his students and the best way to approach and teach to them, to start the new year in September without a hitch.<br/>
Perhaps, in September, he could consider an extracurricular course about Mythology or something… Yeah, he could do that.</p><p>His phone vibrating in his pocket brought him back to reality. </p><p><strong>O 16:00pm:<br/>
</strong>Hey nerd, how did it go? </p><p><strong>Bellamy 16:01pm:</strong><br/>
Ah, all right. The kids like me. <br/>
<br/>
<strong>O 16:01pm:</strong><br/>
Obviously. Now come home so you can tell me all about it.<br/>
And you can make me dinner. <br/>
<br/>
<strong>Bellamy 16:02pm:</strong><br/>
Why I have the impression food is the only thing you talk about? <br/>
<br/>
<strong>O 16:02pm:</strong><br/>
It's like you don't even know me. <br/>
Duh.<br/>
Hurry, NERD <br/>
<br/>
</p><p>Bellamy laughed, putting his phone back in his jacket pocket.<br/>
<br/>
Beginning to walk to the parking lot, he stopped short when he heard a group of students laughing loudly.<br/>
But it weren't the laughs that attracted Bellamy's attention.<br/>
Above all the laughs, another voice was trying to quiet down everyone.<br/>
A voice he recognized immediately.<br/>
A voice he heard for barely five minutes, but was already imprinted in his memory.<br/>
<br/>
Without time to second-guess himself, he turned around and walked in the direction of the voices.<br/>
The classroom door was ajar, so Bellamy decided to peek.<br/>
Just a moment, to see what was going on.<br/>
It was an art class, that was pretty clear. <br/>
All the students were arranged in a semicircle, in front of each there was an easel. Opposite them, in the center of the room, was Clarke.<br/>
She was laughing along with her students, and he could see why too. Her apron was covered in paint, as if she had stumbled on herself and her color palette had fallen on her.<br/>
She was beautiful. Ethereal. <br/>
<br/>
It was at that moment, that something inside of Bellamy snapped.<br/>
Looking at her, so carefree in her element, making a joke about herself with her students… in that moment, he knew without a doubt: he wanted to know everything about this woman.<br/>
And not just the important things, but the silly ones, too. What was her favorite color, book, song. What she liked to do on a rainy day.<br/>
He wanted to see her draw, or paint, for hours. See if when she was in the zone, she would hum or sing, like he was imagining.<br/>
He wanted to know about her family, and about what happened in her past that made Murphy worry so much about her. He wanted to help her get through it.<br/>
<br/>
But what scared him most, was that he was sure: with time, he would learn to love her. <br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<em>One thing at a time, Bellamy. </em>He thought to himself while walking to his car.<em><br/>
Let's start with giving her your name.</em></p><p>
  
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Bellamy tossed and turned all night, thinking about the best way to approach Clarke.<br/>
For a minute, he regretted not letting himself known at the art class that afternoon, but in the end, he made the right choice. <br/>
He didn't want to pass as a creep. </p><p>So, what now?<br/>
<br/>
Should he ask for her schedule at the school? Bump into her casually just after her class? Maybe he should ask Murphy to organize a dinner all together to let his two best friends finally meet each other?  That was a good one. He didn't even know about her existence since yesterday, now she was Murphy's best friend. What a strange world.<br/>
<em>Anyway.<br/>
<br/>
</em>The best choice was to go to the café and hope to find her there. Offer her a coffee. Talk to her.<br/>
With that plan in mind, he finally succumbed to sleep.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
The next morning Bellamy arrived at The Dropship a little earlier than the previous day. Monty and Jasper told him she came in nearly every day around breakfast time, so he wanted to be here before her, to have the time to calm down. So he ordered a coffee, found a table in the corner and started to wait. <br/>
<br/>
After ten minutes, he asked for a refill, took out the book he brought with him (an old version of The Iliad - yeah, he was a nerd, so? Sue him) and started reading.<br/>
Every time he heard the door open his eyes flew up expecting to find her, but he had no such luck.<br/>
<br/>
It took him almost an hour (and several knowing looks from Jasper) to resign himself to the fact that she wouldn't come.<br/>
Well, he had class in two hours, and he promised Octavia to swing by the mall to buy her a charger for her phone.</p><p><br/>
Resigned, he gathered his things, and just as he was about ready to leave, Monty appeared at the doorway of the café and approached him. "Bellamy! It's good to see you so soon." <br/>
<br/>
"Yeah, well, It doesn't take long to fall in love with this place." Not only with the place, but he wasn't about to say it.<br/>
<em>Too soon, Bellamy.<br/>
<br/>
</em>In any case, Monty saw right through him, "With the place, huh?" he said, shooting him a knowing look.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Only Octavia, Murphy and Miller knew his faces... if only.<br/>
He decided it wasn't worth lying about his motives. He shook his head and smiled at Monty, "Ok, yes, I'm not here exclusively for the place, although it really is amazing."<br/>
<br/>
"It is. Clarke did an extraordinary job!" Shouted Jasper from behind the counter.<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy whipped his head to look at him. "She-?"<br/>
<br/>
"Painted all the walls of the café? Yes, she did. Well the project was ours, but she brought it to life." replied Monty.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy was speechless.<br/>
Jasper rounded the counter and gave him a pat on the shoulder. "We did a good job, didn't we?!" he said excitedly.<br/>
<br/>
"Damn right we did." Replied Monty.<br/>
<br/>
The two exchanged a look and then self-fived at the same time.<br/>
Bellamy laughed. "You two are weirdos. But yes guys, this is the place of my dreams."<br/>
<br/>
"Even if the girl of your dreams isn't here?" Replied Jasper, wiggling his eyebrows at him.<br/>
<br/>
"Ignore him," interjected Monty "he is a child. You don't have to answer to that."<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy gave him a grateful smile.<br/>
"Anyway, she's not coming today." Monty continued.<br/>
<br/>
"Huh?"<br/>
<br/>
"Clarke. I just came back from her workplace for the day. She is working on a mural today, it was a last minute thing. She asked me to bring her coffee." Monty explained gently.<br/>
<br/>
"Ah, well thank you." then, to Jasper "You could have told me."<br/>
<br/>
"Why?" said Jasper, with fake surprise. "It was fun to look at you startle every time someone pushed through the door, checking the time every two minutes -"<br/>
<br/>
"Rude, Jasper." Interrupted Monty, looking at his friend disapprovingly.<br/>
<br/>
Jasper pouted and mumbled a "Sorry man, I am way too invested in this."<br/>
<br/>
"I can see that." Answered Bellamy, and then he decided to change subject. "So I heard you guys know Murphy?"<br/>
<br/>
Monty, who was still scolding Jasper for his bad behavior, stopped talking to look at him. "How do you know Murphy?"<br/>
<br/>
"Ah, he's my roommate and kind of my best friend."<br/>
<br/>
"Murphy's back in town?" Monty asked, surprised. <br/>
<br/>
"Well, it seems to me that he and Clarke have so much in common! I have to replace my bet!" Said Jasper instead, clapping his hands excitedly. <br/>
<br/>
Monty slapped him on the head. "Shut up, Jasper!"<br/>
<br/>
But the damage was already done. "BET?!" <br/>
<br/>
Monty was fast to reply. "Oh, nothing, he doesn't know what he is saying!"<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy shot him a threatening look.<br/>
Monty huffed. "Ok, we may have a bet going on, but I won't say anything more."<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy moved his gaze to Jasper, giving him an expecting look. "Don't look at him! He won't talk either." Monty scolded.<br/>
<br/>
"That's unbelievable. I swear, If Murphy knew about it, he would bet too, in between threatening me about Clarke obviously." Bellamy muttered.<br/>
<br/>
At that, they both chuckled.  "It seems our job here is a little easier if Murphy already threatened him." Jasper told Monty, who nodded.<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy smiled, shaking his head. "She has quite the good friends, uh?"<br/>
<br/>
"She has." They answered in unison.<br/>
<br/>
"Well, message received. You can spare me the big speech. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go." <br/>
<br/>
They both nodded and waved at him. "See you tomorrow, Bellamy!" answered Jasper cheekily, earning a chuckle from Monty.<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy narrowed his eyes at him, but didn't even try to correct him.<br/>
It wasn't like he was wrong.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy settled into a routine pretty quickly.<br/>
<br/>
Every day, for the next few days, before classes, he went to the café, drank his coffee and chatted with Monty and Jasper. He read his book. He even met Fox and Sterling, the bartenders that helped the two weirdos in the mornings.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
On Friday, a pretty girl with long, blonde hair appeared and went straight to Monty, giving him a caste kiss on the lips. She talked with him and Fox for a few minutes while they prepared her coffee, and then she turned to Bellamy and came to sit right in front of him, putting coffee and phone on the table. "So you are hot Bellamy, huh? Nice to meet you, I am Harper." She said, sticking out her hand for him to shake.<br/>
<br/>
He did. "Well, I am Bellamy, but it seems you already knew that. Are you Monty's girlfriend?"<br/>
<br/>
She nodded, sipping her coffee. "And a friend of Clarke."<br/>
<br/>
"Ah, now I understand the visit."<br/>
<br/>
She giggled. "Hey now, I wanted to see the object of so many chatters with my own eyes. Can you blame me?"<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy shook his head. "I suppose not."<br/>
<br/>
"Let's talk about serious things then." <br/>
<br/>
"You here to threaten me? 'Cause your boyfriend and his pal already did." Bellamy let out a false cough. "They tried, at least."<br/>
<br/>
Harper gave him a sweet smile. "My dear, I am anything like those two idiots." <br/>
<br/>
"What is this, a "good cop, bad cop" sort of situation?" Bellamy said, amused.<br/>
<br/>
"Think about it as you want, I have questions."<br/>
<br/>
"I have only half an hour."<br/>
<br/>
She leaned back on her chair. "Oh, don't worry, It'll be quick."<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy closed his book and gave her his full attention. "Then hit me, sheriff."<br/>
<br/>
Harper drummed her fingers on the table. "You are new in town, correct?"<br/>
<br/>
He nodded. "I arrived here almost a week ago. But you already knew that."<br/>
<br/>
"Just checking. Do you have a job?"<br/>
<br/>
"Actually that's the main reason I am here. I am a teacher. Principal Jaha offered me a job at the high school, I took it."<br/>
<br/>
"Interesting. What are the other reasons?"<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy looked at her, confused. "Reasons?"<br/>
<br/>
"You said that your job is one of the reasons you are here. What are the others?"<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy scratched the back of his neck nervously. "Well, Murphy's here. He's my best friend. He moved back here a few months ago, and when he left, there wasn't much more that kept me anchored in Polis. I needed a change."<br/>
<br/>
Harper gave him a knowing look. "We are talking about a girl, aren't we?"<br/>
<br/>
"I am not answering this question."<br/>
<br/>
She hummed. "Do you have any brothers? Sisters?"<br/>
<br/>
"A sister, Octavia." sensing her next question he anticipated her. "She came here with me."<br/>
<br/>
"Is she younger than you?"<br/>
<br/>
"Yes."<br/>
<br/>
"Let's talk about the girl that broke your heart."<br/>
<br/>
"I don't think so. Actually, I think I've had enough. You guys keep coming here asking me questions, you know so many things about me already, and I know nearly nothing about you or Clarke! That's crazy. I haven't even met her." He said exasperated.<br/>
<br/>
Harper arched an eyebrow at him. "And still, you want to know her?"<br/>
<br/>
"Of course I do! Why wouldn't I? I keep thinking about her, she-" he stopped, snapping his mouth shut.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
A beat passed, then, Harper's phone dinged with an incoming text.<br/>
<br/>
She took it in her hands to read it, and smirked at him. "Mr. hot Bellamy, please meet Raven Reyes. Unfortunately, she couldn't be here herself, so she asked me to have a little talk with you." She said handing him her phone. "She has something to say to you."<br/>
<br/>
He took the phone and stared at it, shocked. "Oh, and Bellamy," Harper interrupted just as he was lifting the phone to his ear. "She is the bad cop, not me." At that, she winked and gestured for him to take the call.<br/>
<br/>
Unable to form a sentence, he lifted the phone to his ear. "Hello?"<br/>
<br/>
"Bellamy Blake, this is Raven Reyes speaking."<br/>
<br/>
"Huh."<br/>
<br/>
"Please, don't lose the ability to speak right now, keep this superpower for the moment Clarke will finally show up." She snickered.<br/>
<br/>
That got Bellamy's attention. "She will?"<br/>
<br/>
"I hope so." She let out a breath. "Listen to me Bellamy. We are not trying to scare you away. We only want to protect our friend. And if that means go behind her back to make sure she won't get hurt, so be it. I won't be sorry for that."<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy let out a breath. "I have to admit this is completely unexpected. A little funny, too. But I can understand the protectiveness. I have a little sister after all."<br/>
<br/>
"Cute, but I wasn't finished." <br/>
<br/>
Well, this Raven here was a smart ass. She reminded him of Murphy. "Please, go on." He said.<br/>
<br/>
"The point is, we are all trying to convince her to meet you. But she is a bit wary. And if we manage to do so, I have to know that you'll be good to her. I'am not saying you have to give her babies, but that you'll be her friend and give her the time she needs. She doesn't trust others easily, especially new people. I need to know that you won't run away at the first difficulty, or if she takes too long to open up with you."<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy sobered up at that.  "I'm not that type of person."<br/>
<br/>
"What about that girl of your past?"<br/>
<br/>
"She is not a problem, you have to trust me on that." He insisted.<br/>
<br/>
"I should warn you, trust is a hard thing to obtain in this group. But, after everything I heard from you and the others, I am willing to give you the benefit of the doubt."<br/>
<br/>
He snorted. "Comforting."<br/>
<br/>
She ignored him. "I also kindly ask you not to say anything about this to her. She'll kill me if she knew."<br/>
<br/>
"Well, I have to see her in person for that, so I think for now at least, you are in the clear." He said, shaking his head sadly.<br/>
<br/>
"As I said, we are working on that. I know asking you to wait is a weird request to make considering the fact that you don't know her but... I know she'll change her mind, sooner or later."<br/>
<br/>
"I don't need convincing. I'll wait. And even if I didn't like her, which I won't pretend I don't anymore, I am new in town and I like it here. You are a bunch of crazy weirdos, but I can see us all be friends."<br/>
<br/>
"We'll see about that. Bye, hot Bellamy."<br/>
The line went dead.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy scowled at the phone. Why was everyone calling him "hot Bellamy"? <br/>
Had Clarke defined him as hot? So she talked about him? She found him attractive?<br/>
<br/>
He blushed, shaking his head to clear his mind and handing Harper her phone. "Well, that was interesting."<br/>
<br/>
Taking her phone and putting it in her purse, Harper gave him a gentle smile. "Sorry for the ambush."<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy cocked an eyebrow at her. "Be honest with me, should I expect more of you coming out of nowhere to give me the third grade?"<br/>
<br/>
She laughed. "It could happen, yeah. But I'll try to put the dogs on a leash for the time being. I can't promise you anything though."<br/>
<br/>
"Well, that's better than nothing." Bellamy replied, looking past Harper to see Monty approaching the table.<br/>
<br/>
He gave Harper a kiss on the cheek. "Hey babe, did you behave?"<br/>
<br/>
Harper smiled at him innocently. "I sure did."<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy smirked at her. "Ah, she was good, per se. Raven, on the other hand..."<br/>
<br/>
Monty looked at his girlfriend, apparently not surprised at all.  "If I knew you two were up to something, I would have kept quiet. Jasper too."<br/>
<br/>
She gave him a look.<br/>
"Ok, maybe Jasper not." Chuckled Monty.<br/>
<br/>
"Oh baby, don't pretend to be all macho about this, Bellamy already told me your attempt at threatening him failed miserably."<br/>
<br/>
Monty shot him a glare. "Thanks, man. No more free coffee for you."<br/>
<br/>
"Hey, now! It was the truth."<br/>
<br/>
"Don't be an ass, the both of you." Scolded Harper, standing. <br/>
<br/>
"Sorry." They both mumbled.<br/>
<br/>
Harper shook her head, giggling and taking Monty's hand. "May I remind you that your parents are waiting for us?"<br/>
<br/>
Monty nodded. "Right, let's go. See you Bellamy."<br/>
<br/>
"Have a nice day, the both of you."<br/>
<br/>
With an unexpected gesture, Harper left Monty's side and came over to Bellamy, giving him a quick hug. "Again, sorry for the ambush."<br/>
<br/>
Awkwardly, Bellamy returned the hug. "Ah, don't worry about it."<br/>
<br/>
She stepped away and started toward Monty, only to stop mid step to turn towards him another time. "I like you, Bellamy Blake. Don't be a stranger."<br/>
<br/>
He laughed, embarrassed. "I won't."<br/>
<br/>
"Bring your sister the next time."<br/>
<br/>
"And Murphy, too." Added Monty.<br/>
<br/>
He smiled at them. "Will do."<br/>
<br/>
"And, Bellamy?"<br/>
<br/>
He lifted his eyes to look at her.<br/>
<br/>
"Give her time. She'll come around." <br/>
<br/>
<em>God, I hope so.</em> He thought.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy hoped after his interrogation with Harper and Raven things would change rather quickly.<br/>
Her friends asked him to give her time? He could do that.<br/>
<br/>
And he did.<br/>
He waited for her.<br/>
<br/>
But still, she never showed up.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<em>Just a little more time, Bellamy.</em> He kept repeating himself.<br/>
<em>Just a little more time. She'll come around.</em></p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
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  <p>Clarke was afraid. <br/>She knew Bellamy was at the café every morning waiting for her.<br/><br/>How did she know?<br/><br/>The day after her first encounter with Bellamy she received a text from Jasper, telling her <em>"her hot guy was at the café waiting for her looking at the door like a lost puppy and reading a history book."</em><br/><br/>So yeah, she knew Bellamy was at the café every morning waiting for her, but she couldn't go.<br/>She wasn't ready. She wanted to know him, she did. Her heart started beating faster if she thought about the way he held her, gently, like she could break if only he gripped her a little too tight. If she thought about his earthy eyes. His freckled skin...<br/><br/>But the thing was, Clarke wasn't one to follow her heart. <br/>She listened to her head. She trusted her instinct, it was the only thing that kept her afloat all these years.<br/><br/>And her head now was telling her she couldn't let someone in, not even a guy who she was interested in. Especially a guy who she was interested in. She couldn't risk it.<br/><br/><br/><br/>The reality was: Clarke was a coward.<br/><br/><br/><br/>It was Sunday afternoon, and she was sprawled out on her couch watching Brooklyn 99 on Netflix for the hundredth time, still trying to recover from Harper's birthday party the night before, when she heard the door of her apartment open. Only two people had the keys of her apartment, and Raven wasn't supposed to get here until after dinner for their weekly girls night. <br/>That only left...<br/><br/><br/>The intruder plopped beside her on the couch and immediately put his head in her lap.<br/><br/>"For a minute there I was sure I saw a cockroach, but I certainly must be dreaming." She said, smiling down at him.<br/><br/>"It's good to see you, Griffin." He said, poking her stomach.<br/><br/>She swatted his hand away. "You, too. Care to give me a hug?"<br/><br/>He immediately stood up and did just that. She held him tightly. "You here for good?"<br/><br/>He held her tighter. "I am. I promise."<br/><br/>"Good. I missed you, Murph."<br/><br/>He chuckled. "All these years and only you call me that. Missed you too Clarke."<br/><br/>He released her, and they settled together on the couch, chatting lightly and occasionally watching the TV. Not even ten minutes later, Murphy stopped talking in the middle of a sentence, looked at her somberly and said "Ok, I can't go on like that. I need to tell you something."<br/><br/>Clarke eyed him with interest.<br/><br/>"But," he continued "you have to promise me that you won't be angry at me and that at least you'll let me explain before eventually lashing out at me. Personally, I prefer the "not be angry at Murphy" version most, but-"<br/><br/>"Just let it out Murphy, I won't interrupt, I promise." She stopped him.<br/><br/>Murphy arched an eyebrow at her, unconvinced. "Ok, ok, it's gonna be hard either way. I'm going to start this conversation by saying that I am sorry. I am sorry because I lied at you for months." He took in a long breath. "Remember when I told you me and Emori broke up?"<br/><br/>She nodded.<br/><br/>"At the time, I was already leaving here. Remember when I told you I finally found a new job?"<br/><br/>Again, she nodded.<br/><br/>"It was here, in Arkadia. I started working there six months ago, more or less. At the same time, I rented a place with Emori to move back here. It's near the restaurant I work at, Mount Weather, you know it?"<br/><br/>Apparently, the only thing Clarke was able to do was nod.<br/><br/>A heavy silence descended on them.<br/>Murphy was watching her closely, giving her time to elaborate all the things he just told her.<br/><br/>After a few minutes of silence, he shook his head and sighed. "Clarke, I am sorry. I, I wanted to tell you so badly, really. It's just... The last time we saw each other, last year... you told me in your eyes I didn't seem happy. And you were right. I wasn't. At the time, I believed my unhappiness depended on solely my job. So I thought maybe changing air would be good for me, for us."<br/><br/>"I moved back here and Emori came with me. The idea was to start my life here and, once I was sure it was all going on smoothly, come here to you to let you see you were wrong." <br/>He gave her a sad smile. "But again you were right. Emori... she is truly amazing. But once I arrived here and started working at the restaurant... I love working there. They let me the freedom to try new recipes, my coworkers are fine to work with... I found my place there. And with time, it came clear to me that finding the right job wasn't the only problem. Coming home every day to Emori, holding her at night... After three years it all came easily. But soon enough we both realized it wasn't right." <br/><br/>He scratched his chin and addressed her. "Please, say something."<br/><br/>"You asked me not to interrupt you." She pointed out.<br/><br/>Murphy rolled his eyes. "Well, you have my permission to talk, dick."<br/><br/>"In that case, maybe it's the time for me to say that I already knew you moved back here." She said nonchalantly. <br/><br/>Murphy smirked. "Of course you did. How?"<br/><br/>"Well first on the list, because after all these years I like to think I know you well enough to understand when you are lying to me Murphy." Clarke said giving him a pointed look. "Second, three months ago, Jackson said he was fairly certain he saw you at the hospital." <br/><br/>"Fuck, I was careful not to let myself known!" He scolded himself. <br/><br/>Clarke bumped her shoulder with his and chuckled. "Not careful enough." <br/><br/>"Yes, yes, right. I cut my finger pretty badly at work one day. Believe it or not, I actually understood I had to end things with Emori while slicing a zucchini." <br/><br/>"I really don't find it that hard to believe." Clarke said laughing along with him. She quickly sobered up tough. "It all comes down to the third reason, then." <br/><br/>Murphy cocked an eyebrow at her. "Which is?" <br/><br/>Clarke let out a long breath, preparing herself to finally let out the secret she kept from him for all these months. <br/><br/>Murphy caught on pretty quickly. "What did you do, Griffin?" <br/><br/>"Remember awhile back I told you I was working on a mural for a new restaurant here in town?" <br/><br/>"It was Mount Weather?" <br/><br/>Clarke simply nodded. <br/><br/>Murphy considered it and then smiled proudly at her. "Damn, I should have known it. Thinking about it now, it's clear you made it. It's beautiful by the way. Paris in all its magic and splendor." <br/><br/>She smiled. "Thank you. It was a challenge really. Mr. Vie came up every day with new proposals and things he wanted absolutely in the mural, I swear I had to draw at least twenty sketches!" <br/><br/>"Yeah, he is a perfectionist, so I bet he drew you nuts. Maya always makes fun of him about it. But I think it's a strength really. He is good in what he does. But please, go on." <br/><br/>"Ok, so... we worked on the mural together for so many weeks, we got acquainted fast, he is a nice person to talk and work with. He was so pleased with how it all turned out! He even bought one of my pieces to hang in his office. Anyway... a few months after the opening of the restaurant, he came to me to ask if I knew a cook, because things with the restaurant were going better than he expected, and he realized he couldn't go on much longer alone." <br/><br/>Clarke watched understanding wash down Murphy's face. He opened his mouth to say something, but Clarke didn't let him speak. "I'm sorry, ok? I know that you don't want to depend on other people, that you want to do everything on your own and all that. But it was a too good of a chance to let it go. And I didn't really do anything, I just told him I had a friend who could cook, and he asked me for your number-" <br/><br/>Murphy put a hand on her mouth to shush her. "You done?" <br/><br/>She shook her head no, and Murphy laughed. "I say that you are done. Now listen to me. I am not mad at you." <br/><br/>Clarke's eyes snapped to his. "You aren't?" she tried to mumble from under his hand. <br/><br/>"How could I, Griffin? You gave me the best job in the universe." <br/><br/>At that, she shook his hand away from her face. "I didn't. I only gave him your number. The rest was all you Murphy." <br/><br/>"You sure about that?" He asked her suspicious.<br/><br/>"I swear. Mr. Vie even called me after your interview. He told me you were a cocky kid with a volcano in its head but so much talent he couldn't do anything but give you a job." She quoted. <br/><br/>Murphy gave her a sardonic grin. "Cocky, huh?" he said, tickling her in the side. <br/><br/>She squealed. "You know you are! Stop, stop it please!" <br/><br/>They both laughed. "Damn, I missed you Griffin." he said, side hugging her. <br/><br/>Clarke buried her head in his chest. "I missed you too, Murph." <br/><br/>They stayed like that for a few more moments, then Murphy kissed her hair and stood up, announcing "I am making you dinner." <br/><br/>Clarke bounced on the couch. "Yay! Chef Murphy is back!" <br/><br/>"If you really want your dinner, you should think about pouring me a glass of wine, Miss!" Murphy sang while going in the kitchen.<br/><br/>"Yes, chef!" she replied, changing the TV to a music channel and following him.<br/><br/>While Murphy started rummaging throughout her kitchen in search of inspiration, Clarke did what he asked, opening the fridge to take a bottle of red wine, pouring two glasses and handing one to him.<br/>She sat on a stool at the kitchen counter, watching her friend work in companionable silence.<br/><br/>He was cutting vegetables when he spoke next. "I am sorry I didn't tell you I was back in town."<br/><br/>"Ah, don't worry about it. If I really needed to see you in person, I would've known where to find you. I know you need time to yourself once in a while, and you know I am always here for you when you are ready."<br/><br/>Murphy hummed. "That goes both ways, you know that right?" he said, finally looking at her.<br/><br/>She smiled. "Of course."<br/><br/>Murphy watched her with a calculating look. "You don't have anything you want to tell me?"<br/><br/>Her silence was answer enough. Murphy abruptly stopped and put the knife down, cursing. "I can't believe it, those idiots for once managed to tell you nothing!"<br/><br/>Clarke was confused. "What are you talking about?"<br/><br/>Murphy took a long pull of his wine and began cooking again. "Let's start from the beginning, shall we?" he asked, rhetorically. "I know you accidentally bumped into someone the other day." <br/><br/>"I don't know what you are talking about."<br/><br/>"Yes, so the name Bellamy Blake is new to your ears?"<br/><br/>She shrugged, feigning ignorance and sipping her wine.<br/><br/>He stared at her, unimpressed. "Clarke, Bellamy's my best friend."<br/><br/>She chocked on her wine. "What?!" She sputtered.<br/>It couldn't be. She knew all about Murphy's best friend, he was a teacher, a history nerd, Murphy hated his girlfriend and was fond of his sister with an historical name Clarke couldn't remember at the moment, and his name was Blake-<br/><br/>Blake.<br/>Bellamy Blake.<br/><br/><br/>Clarke swallowed the remnants of her glass and poured herself another one.<br/><br/>"Hey now, slow down Griffin!" Murphy said, taking the bottle away from her. "I really thought Monty and Jasper already told you we know each other. Bellamy went to the café every morning since the day he met you, they had quite the time to talk."<br/><br/>"Yes, that I already knew." She mumbled, playing with her half full glass.<br/><br/>"And you know he still goes there only because he hopes to meet you properly, I assume?"<br/><br/>She nodded.<br/><br/>Murphy started setting the table. "So what are you waiting for?"<br/><br/>"I don't know. The morning after we first bumped into each other I was busy with a commission, so I couldn't go. Then, Jasper started texting me every day that he was there looking for me and I panicked."<br/><br/>Murphy rolled his eyes angrily. "Jasper is an idiot. He shouldn't have told you nothing."<br/><br/>"He gave me an out."<br/><br/>"An out? Clarke, what are you afraid of?"<br/><br/><em>Yeah, that was the question.</em> <br/><br/>She sighed. "I can't let someone in Murphy, you above all know that."<br/><br/>He abandoned the stove and came to sit beside her. "What I know, is that years have passed. You are a different person. And not everyone is fucking Finn Collins. You were in a bad place when he came into your life, and he screwed you up even more. That can't change." He took her hand in both of his. "But you have to let someone in. Someone who isn't me or Raven. It doesn't have to be Bellamy if you don't want to, even though I think he could be good for you."<br/><br/>She looked at him, surprised, and he shushed her. "Let me finish. I already had a pep talk with him. I threatened him really." he chuckled. "But I also told him this: I think you two could be good for each other. I am pretty certain of that. And I am sure now you are already in a spiral thinking about the ways you have to run away from the situation once again, but this time I'm here with you, ok? I'm not saying you have to marry him, but you two could become friends. With his sister too. They are good people, and I would be happy to finally have a friend circle with both my best friends in it."<br/><br/>Clarke huffed. "You are playing dirty, Murphy."<br/><br/>"I am. And, Clarke... I love you, and I don't want you to get hurt. But I do think the time has come for you to put yourself on the line. I'll be right behind you in every step of the way."<br/><br/>Clarke looked at Murphy, unsure. "You promise?"<br/><br/>"I promise. Team cockroach, remember?" he said, squeezing her hand and standing to return to the stove.<br/><br/>She let out a watery laugh. <br/><br/><br/>A few minutes passed, and at last Murphy placed a plate of steaming steak with vegetables in front of her. "Et voilà!"<br/><br/>She took a bite and moaned. "God, I missed your cuisine."<br/><br/>Murphy, who in the meantime took place in front of her on the other side of the counter, smirked at her and started eating.<br/><br/>Suddenly, something came to her mind, and she dropped her fork. Murphy jumped. "Fuck, Griffin, you gave me a heart attack! What happened?!"<br/><br/>Clarke shot him a glare. "YOU THREATENED HIM?!"<br/><br/>Murphy looked at her impassively for a moment and then busted out laughing. "Of course I did. Also, Monty and Jasper. Probably Harper, too."<br/><br/>"WHAT?" She shrieked.<br/><br/>"Oh, come on, don't be so surprised, you know we love you."<br/><br/>Ah, he was playing all his cards today, the dick. She gave him a genuine smile shaking her head. "You guys are impossible."<br/><br/>"But you love us."<br/><br/>"Unfortunately, I do."<br/><br/>He threw his napkin at her.<br/><br/><br/>"Hey, who's in love with whom?!" Came Raven's voice from the doorway.<br/><br/>"Clarke with Bellamy probably, but that's another story!" Murphy cackled.<br/><br/>Clarke threw his napkin back at him. "I hate you."<br/><br/>"Well if it isn't the infamous John Murphy in the house." Raven said, entering the kitchen and giving Clarke a kiss on the cheek. "Hey, Griffin."<br/><br/>"Long time no see, Reyes." Murphy replied assessing her.<br/><br/>"Well, I did see you a few months ago, but your sorry ass didn't want to let us know he was back in town, so I changed street." Raven sneered.<br/><br/>Murphy eyed her friend up and down and winked. <br/><em>Oh, that'll be fun to watch.</em> <br/><br/>"Well, now I am back for good, so no more running away from me little bird."<br/><br/>"As if it'll be possible. You'll be a pain in my ass, I can see it."<br/><br/>"You wound me." <br/><br/>"You already ruined my girls night with Clarke!"<br/><br/>"How?"<br/><br/>"I brought all this junk food and you made her dinner. Now she won't eat anything!"<br/><br/>"Hey, I always have space for candies." She jumped in, taking the bag Raven was waving in the air.<br/><br/>Murphy shot Raven an amused look. "See, I didn't ruin her precious appetite."<br/><br/>"We'll see about that." Raven gritted through her teeth.<br/><br/>"Damn, just fuck already and let me eat my candies in peace." Clarke let out in the end.<br/><br/><br/>They abruptly stopped their back and forth to stare at each other and then at her. She shrugged. "What. There's so much sexual tension in the room I could cut it with a knife." she pointed out.<br/><br/>Again, they stared at each other for a moment too long. <br/>Then, Raven cleared her throat and, as the ass she is, changed the subject. "So Murphy, what were you saying earlier about Bellamy?"<br/><br/>And as the ass he too is, he picked up on it immediately. "Right, I was just making a joke to Clarke about her crush on Bellamy."<br/><br/>"Look what a powerful duo we have here, working together to save your own asses…" Clarke snickered.<br/><br/>Raven held up her hand. "Don't change the subject, Griffin!"<br/><br/>Clarke rolled her eyes. "What, like you just did?"<br/><br/>Murphy stood up and started putting the dishes in the sink. "So, Raven, I'll have you know, I convinced Clarke to go to the Café to meet Bellamy tomorrow."<br/><br/>Clarke arched an eyebrow. "You didn't."<br/><br/>"Of course he didn't." Said Raven, almost to herself. Then, she turned to Murphy. "I've been trying to convince her to go for days. Did you really think that telling her he's your best friend would have made her change idea?"<br/><br/>"You knew?!" Clarke exclaimed.<br/><br/>"Yes, I did. Jasper came to me to replace his bet after he found out."<br/><br/>At that, Murphy perked up. "Bet?"<br/><br/>"Shut up, Murphy." Both girls said in unison.<br/><br/>Murphy held up his hands in a placating manner and kept on cleaning, leaving both girls at their argument. <br/><br/>Raven was the first one to speak. "Clarke, don't be mad at me for keeping this from you. I didn't tell you 'cause I knew you would have panicked even more. And I-"<br/><br/>"Rae, stop. I am not mad at you. I am irritated, yes, because it seems my life has become the life of everyone here, but that's nothing new. " She looked at her hands. "What I really am, is mad at myself." She finally admitted.<br/><br/>Both her friends stopped to look at her. It was Raven who spoke first, taking a stool and sitting beside her. "Babe, why are you saying that?"<br/><br/>"Because it's the truth. I am so angry at myself, for staying anchored to the past, for not having the strength to move on with my life. One would suppose that after all these years I learned how to live with my fears... but I haven't. I am still scared. I can't even let myself think that I could like this guy, that I feel the panic rising... I'm a mess."<br/><br/>"That's bullshit Clarke and you know it." Murphy pointed out. "You've been through some pretty bad shit, and you came out of it a long time ago. It's true, you take with you some baggage, but that doesn't mean you can't go on with your life, at all."<br/><br/>"I hate to admit it," Raven joked "but Murphy's right. You are not a coward for trying to save yourself the trouble of getting hurt. You've been alone since Lexa, you didn't even think about finding someone in these last few years, and now... you clearly are interested in this guy. You just need time to elaborate and understand your feelings."<br/><br/>They crushed her in a hug that lasted quite some time.<br/>"Just take your time Clarke, it'll be fine." Murphy reassured, giving her one last squeeze before releasing her.<br/><br/>"We'll see. Can we watch a movie now?" She pleaded.<br/><br/>Raven made a face. "With him?"<br/><br/>Clarke stood up from her stool and snapped her fingers. "Hop, hop!" <br/><br/>She then approached her friend and whispered in her ear. "Don't pretend you don't want him here Reyes, I see the way you look at him."<br/><br/>Raven looked at her, affronted. "And how do I look at him, uh?"<br/><br/>She smirked. "Like you want to jump his bones. But don't worry, he looks at you the same way." at Raven's shocked face, she laughed. "Come on, genius, I don't have all night! Murphy have you chosen the movie?" she asked, entering the living room and jumping on the couch.<br/><br/>"Reyes here brought only girly films... but I could go with Grease."<br/><br/>"Yay, lets all fall in love with Danny Zuko!" Clarke said cheerily to stop the retort that was escaping from Raven's mouth. <br/><br/><br/>As the film started, she patted the couch on every side of her. <br/><br/><br/><br/>Lying on the couch, with her head in Raven's lap and her feet in Murphy's, watching her friends shoot each other curious looks when they thought the other wasn't looking, she allowed herself to let her guard down, only for a moment. <br/>Here, with them, she felt safe. <br/><br/><br/>She considered their words. <br/><br/>Was she ready to open up to someone? <br/>Was it worth the risk? <br/><br/>Only one way to find out.<br/><br/>If she didn't try, she would never know.<br/><br/>So she decided.  <br/><br/>Tomorrow.<br/><br/>Tomorrow she would go to the café and meet Bellamy Blake.<br/><br/><br/><br/><br/></p>
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  <p><br/><br/><br/><br/>When she arrived at the café the next morning, she saw him immediately.<br/><br/>He was wearing a pair of dark blue slacks and a white shirt, with the sleeves rolled up. And he was wearing glasses.<br/>He had eyes and attention deep in an old book, so much so that he didn't even lift his eyes at the sound of the door opening. <br/><br/><br/>Thank god it was Monday, so Monty and Jasper wouldn't be here, both having the day off after the evening shifts of the weekend.<br/>Paying attention to not let herself known too soon, she went to the counter to greet Fox and ask for two coffees.<br/><br/>"Bellamy always takes his black." Fox prompted, smiling at her knowingly.<br/><br/>Clarke rolled her eyes. "They can't really keep their mouth shut, huh?" she muttered to herself, taking the cups. "Thanks, Fox."<br/><br/>The girl blushed, ashamed. "Sorry Clarke, but... you know Jasper."<br/><br/>Clarke shook her head and smiled. "Unfortunately. Just, please, don't text them as soon as I turn my back to you, ok?"<br/><br/>Fox nodded.<br/><br/>"And no photos!"<br/><br/>"I promise, I won't. Now go, he waited for you long enough."<br/><br/>"Have a nice day, Fox!" Clarke promptly said, already walking toward Bellamy's table.<br/><br/>She giggled.  "You too, good luck!"<br/><br/><br/><br/><em>Ok Clarke, no going back now.<br/><br/><br/></em>Slowly, she approached his table. <br/><br/>He still hadn't seen her, so immersed in his book. The Iliad, she finally noticed. She giggled to herself. <br/>He was cute.<br/><br/>Stopping right in front of him, she cleared her throat and started speaking without giving herself the time to change her mind. "Well, they told me you are a nerd, but, The Iliad? We are on another level here." she let out as lightly as possible, giving him a sunny smile.<br/><br/>He startled, dropping his book, and his head snapped up, glasses falling to the tip of his nose and eyes locking into hers.<br/><br/>A few moments passed, and then he did something that thinking about it was natural, but for Clarke, in that moment, was totally unexpected.<br/>Maybe because she bailed on him the day they first met, or maybe because she ignored him for days after... in any case, she wasn't prepared for the blinding smile that erupted onto his face.<br/><br/><br/><em>Damn, she was screwed.</em></p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey guys!</p><p>Sorry for the delay!<br/>Here's a new chapter, hope you'll all enjoy it!<br/>Let me know what you think!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>For days, he waited for her. <br/>He gave her the time her friends told him she needed.<br/>This morning, when he woke up, he chose not to think about the possibility of finding her at the café.<br/><br/>But when he lifted his eyes and found her standing before him, offering him a coffee, with her cheeks flushed and her eyes unsure, he swore he could've fainted if he wasn't already sitting on a chair.<br/><br/><em><br/>Fuck, he wasn't ready for this.<br/><br/></em><br/>For a moment, he just stared at her.<br/><br/>Bellamy tried to maintain an appearance of resolve, just for a second, but who was he kidding? He couldn't help the big smile that broke onto his face. <br/>He took the coffee she offered and decided to go for nonchalant. "Yeah, well, that's me, history books are my to go books. Take it or leave it."<br/><br/>And fuck if it wasn't the right thing to say.<br/>She shook her head giving him a small smile. "Well, I think I'll take it, for now."<br/><br/>He averted his gaze, shaking his head and smiling at her boldness, freeing the table from his things and motioning for her to sit.<br/><br/>For a few moments, they just looked at each other.</p><p>Bellamy couldn't believe it.<br/>She was here.<br/><br/><em>Don't screw it up now, Bellamy.</em><br/><em>Say something.<br/><br/><br/></em>In the end, they started in unison.<br/><br/>"So..." She said.<br/><br/>"Well..." He said.<br/><br/>She giggled, embarrassed, looking at her hands. "Well, I think I should start this conversation by saying that I am sorry. For bailing on you all these days, and for my assholes friends who probably threatened you in all the ways possible."<br/><br/><em>Holy shit, she was cute.<br/><br/></em>"Well, I think I should instead start this conversation by saying: hi, I'm Bellamy Blake." <br/>He staked out his hand for her to shake.<br/><br/>She took it easily. "Nice to meet you Bellamy Blake, you can call me Clarke. Griffin."<br/><br/>He smirked at her. "I prefer Princess better."</p><p>She looked at him, unimpressed. "Is this going to stick?"<br/><br/>He nodded." Sure thing, Princess."<br/><br/>"Wonderful." She said, unamused.<br/><br/>"Better get used to that, 'cause when I pick a nickname, it won't change."<br/><br/>She rolled her eyes. "Whatever, nerd."<br/><br/>He shot her an incredulous look.<br/><br/>"What? You call me princess? I call you nerd."<br/><br/>He leaned back in his chair. "Well, you are not the first and you won't be the last who calls me that, so it could've gone worse."<br/><br/>"Don't worry, give me some more time, I'll find an even better nickname for you."<br/><br/>"I don't doubt that." He took a sip of his coffee, giving her an inquisitive look. "So, how much about me have your friends told you?"<br/><br/>She blushed. "Did I already apologize about that?"<br/><br/>He grinned. "You did. But don't worry about it. It was fun. Unexpected, but fun."<br/><br/>She shook her head. "They are incredible. Anyway...they didn't tell me anything really. Only your name, and it was a slip of Jasper."<br/><br/>"Really not surprising." He said, laughing.<br/><br/>"Right?" She said. "But in the end, I understood more about you when I found out you are Murphy's best friend."<br/><br/>"Murphy's other best friend, you mean." He specified.<br/><br/>She nodded. "I suppose. Is that a problem for you?"<br/><br/>He quickly shook his head. "Of course not. It just shocked me when he told me he didn't only know you, but you were one of the most important persons in his life."<br/><br/>She giggled. "Same here. In the last few years he talked about you a lot. When he told me you were the mysterious friend he always referred to, it really was a shock to me."<br/><br/>He perked up at that. Murphy talked about him? "What did he tell you about me? If you don't mind..."<br/><br/>She leaned back in her chair, smiling. "All good things, don't worry. Well, almost. Like how you two met."<br/><br/>He groaned. "Ok, I should go now while I still can."<br/><br/>She laughed. "Hey! How could he imagine we would be here talking about it one day?"<br/><br/>"Still, that story is an embarrassing one for me, he shouldn't have told anyone." <br/><br/>"Don't be grumpy, It was a fun story to hear. I thought it was cute."<br/><br/>His eyes snapped to hers. "What?"<br/><br/>She gave him an amused look. "A hot guy dressed as Apollo running into the bar where I work at asking if Cleopatra came in here before him to go to the bathroom, only to find her flirting with a Jack Sparrow? Yeah, not funny, at all."<br/><br/>He stood up. "I am going to kill him. Like, right now."<br/><br/>"Put away your lightning bolts and sit down, Zeus!" She scolded him, trying not to laugh.<br/><br/>He shot her murderous look. "Funny. Don't ever call me Zeus again. He was an -"<br/><br/>"Asshole full of himself?" She gave him a cocky smile. "Yeah, thinking about it now, I should have gone with another God." <br/><br/>He tried to remain calm at her comment, on the outside.<br/>On the inside, he was burning.<br/>She was beautiful, smart, she liked art, and history...<br/><br/>He cleared his throat and let himself fall back on the chair. "Let's talk a bit more about what Murphy told you about me."<br/><br/>She arched an eyebrow at him. "What are you so worried about?"<br/><br/>"Knowing Murphy? About everything."<br/><br/>She laughed. "Don't be. He just told me you teach history, that you have a sister with an historical name that I can't remember right now, and that she drives you nuts, and he loves it..."<br/><br/>He shook his head, smiling. "Definitely true, she is a pain in my ass most days. Her name's Octavia."<br/><br/>Clarke's eyes bulged out at that. "You named her, didn't you?"<br/><br/>He slowly nodded.<br/><br/>"And how old were you?"<br/><br/>"Six." He mumbled.<br/><br/>She tried and failed to suppress a laugh. He stared at her, unimpressed.<br/><br/>"Sorry! It's just, he wasn't joking when he kept telling me you are a total nerd!" <br/><br/>"Octavia is a beautiful name, I'll have you know." He pointed out, pretending to be upset.<br/><br/>She kicked him in the shin under the table. "Oh, don't be such a grumpy!"<br/><br/>She was making fun about him, and he was entranced by her laugh.<br/>But <em>he</em> was making her laugh, so how could he pretend to be angry?<br/><br/>"Whatever you say, Princess." He said, smirking and kicking her back.<br/><br/>She arched an eyebrow, but eventually decided not to reiterate, settling for just stare at him contemplatively.<br/><br/>Sensing her intense stare on him, he took a sip from his coffee, and, debating with himself for a few seconds he decided to ask her the question that was nagging him since Murphy brought it out. He cleared his throat. "Can I ask you a question?"<br/><br/>She snapped out of her staring session to nod at him.<br/><br/>"All these days... It was me you were afraid about?"<br/><br/>"Absolutely not." She said without hesitation.<br/><br/>"Then what is it? What are you so afraid of knowing people?"<br/><br/>She shifted nervously in her seat.<br/><br/>"Hey, you don't have to tell me." He told her gently.<br/><br/>She nodded gratefully and remained silent for a few moments. When he saw the determination sparkle in her eyes he knew she chose to open up with him. "I am not afraid of you. I am afraid about getting attached only to... loose you, in the end."<br/><br/>He sensed that she didn't want to elaborate more. But he couldn't let the subject drop just now.<br/>He placed his hand on top of hers on the table.<br/>Her eyes lifted to look at him, surprised.<br/><br/>"I know you probably won't take this seriously because you don't know me. But, I am here to stay. Maybe in a week we'll find out that we hate each other, or maybe that we could be great friends. In any case, you'll always find me ready to support you."<br/><br/>She stared at him, unsure.<br/><br/>He squeezed her hand. "Trust me, ok?"<br/><br/><br/>Bellamy knew he just passed as a total idiot. <br/>He couldn't explain why he said those things to her, the words flew out of his mouth naturally, as if they were always been there.<br/>He didn't know anything about this girl, but the bond that he felt as soon as he took her in his arms that first day... he couldn't contain himself. He had to let her know. <br/>She had to feel it too, right?<br/><br/><br/>She opened her mouth to reply, but her phone started ringing.<br/>Well, she sure as hell was a requested one, he thought.<br/><br/>She glanced at her phone and winced. "Sorry, I have to take it."<br/><br/>He smiled kindly, releasing her hand and gesturing at her to take the call.<br/><br/>"Hey Linc! Everything ok?"<br/><br/>After that, he tuned out. <br/>He took his phone from the table and pretended to scroll through Instagram, when he really was just freaking out.<br/><br/>Who the hell was Linc?<br/>Why everyone never mentioned him?<br/>Had he waited for her only to find out that she already has someone?<br/><br/><em>So much for that bond, Bellamy.</em><br/><br/><br/><br/><br/></p><hr/><p> </p><hr/><p><br/><br/><br/><br/>Clarke watched a cloud descend on Bellamy's face when she answered her phone.<br/>How could she read him this well already?<br/><br/><br/>"Griff, hey. Sorry to disturb you. I was just wondering if you could swing by the gallery?" Lincoln asked her.<br/><br/>"I'll be there just after lunch, remember?"<br/><br/>"Yeah, but actually, I need you here like, now."<br/><br/>She paused.<br/>He was nervous.<br/><br/>She straightened up on her chair. "Is everything ok? Did something happen?"<br/><br/>Bellamy's gaze snapped to hers, clouds forgotten, a questioning look on his face.<br/><br/>"Yes, nothing major. Just, remember a few weeks ago when we talked about the possibility of hiring an assistant for the gallery?"<br/><br/>"I do. What that's got to do with your strange behavior?"<br/><br/>"I just think it's time for us to act on that front."<br/><br/>What the hell was going on?<br/>"Damn it Lincoln, just explain yourself."<br/><br/>"Clarke..." he said, whispering. "The most beautiful girl in the world just came through the door of the gallery asking me if I knew someone who needed an assistant or an event manager."<br/><br/><br/>After a couple of seconds of silence, Clarke hung up the call and threw her phone on the table, shocked.<br/><br/>Bellamy was still eyeing her curiously. "Hum, everything all right?"<br/><br/>She held up her finger to ask him for a moment more, and piked up her phone just in time to see a new incoming call from Lincoln.<br/>She took a breath and answered the call.<br/><br/>"... Clarke?" Lincoln tentatively said.<br/><br/>"Let's see if I got everything right. You call me out of the blue, acting strangely,  going around the topic of your call, making me worry not only about the gallery but about you."<br/><br/>"Sorry I may have delayed a bit-"<br/><br/>"And all for a cute girl whom you want to offer a job to?"<br/><br/>"Well, I am an idiot. I am sorry. She just- she came out of nowhere with this beautiful smile and this body that, huh. Ok, I am not rambling. Take your time, I'll tell her to come back after we set an interview."<br/><br/>She started picking up her things. "Oh don't worry big baby, I am already on my way. Have to see the girl of your dreams."<br/><br/>"But Clarke -"<br/><br/>"No buts, Linc. We have an interview to make, am I right? See you in a bit."<br/><br/><br/><br/>As soon as she ended the call, she busted out laughing.<br/><br/>"Damn, I thought your friends were evils, but the one I should be really worried about is you, isn't it, princess?" Bellamy said, laughing along with her.<br/><br/>She stuck her tongue out at him, blushing. "Sorry, that was Lincoln, the guy I co-own the gallery with. Apparently, a girl stole his heart away today." <br/><br/>"Yeah, I know the feeling." He mumbled. <br/><br/>Had she heard that right?<br/>"What?" She asked, surprised.<br/><br/>His eyes bulged out of his head, as if he thought she hadn't heard him. "Ah, nothing, I - I suppose you have to go..." He said, scratching the back of his neck.<br/><br/>She decided to let it go, and composed herself instead. "Yes, sorry about that..."<br/><br/>He gave her a crooked smile. "Don't worry princess, I know you are a runner."<br/><br/>She knew he wanted to make a joke, but she decided to answer him honestly. Standing up, she took her purse, looked at him right in the eyes and said "I am trying not to."<br/><br/>He seemed taken aback from her comment, but soon enough a smile appeared in that beautiful face of his. "Well, I suppose I'll see you around then, princess."<br/><br/>"You will. It was nice to meet you. Sorry if it took too long." She said, waving and retreating to the exit of the café.<br/><br/>And, she didn't know if Bellamy's reply was meant for her to hear, but when an echo of an "I'll wait." came to her ears she knew she wasn't ready to say goodbye to him yet. Or never really.<br/>With her hand already on the door she spun around in her heels and called out to him. "Bellamy?"<br/><br/>He was still looking at her. "Yeah?"<br/><br/>"Do you want to come with me?"<br/><br/><br/><br/><br/></p><hr/><p></p><div>
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  <p>Clarke didn't know what possessed her when she asked Bellamy if he wanted to come with her at the gallery.<br/><br/>She remembered how his features relaxed when she told him Lincoln was just a friend, only to tense up again when she told him she had to leave.<br/>The only thing she knew was that she didn't want her encounter with him to end.<br/>So she acted on instinct and asked him to follow her.<br/><br/>She soon realized it wasn't just that though.<br/>Whit that invitation, she didn't just ask him if he wanted to spend some more time with her, but she unconsciously asked him if he wanted to see her art, and by extension her life.<br/><br/>There was something in Bellamy, an aura surrounding him. <br/>Walking beside him, she could feel it all: the strength, the tranquility, the safety, they were all radiating from him, and she felt comforted.<br/><br/><br/>In the short walk that it took them to arrive at Trikru, Clarke explained to Bellamy why she was so excited to hear that her friend was interested in someone.<br/>For Lincoln, family always came first. When he was younger there wasn't time for relationships. He told her that in the past, when they were not even friends, finding a girlfriend was never his priority. He had to go to school, find a job, help his parents. So when he needed, from time to time girls came and girls went. <br/><br/>Only when they opened the gallery he convinced himself to slow down and live the moment.<br/>Just like that, he stopped taking random girls home. He was done.<br/><br/>The first time that he sold one of his paintings he came to her and promised that the next girl to enter his life would be his last. The one. He could take care of himself without problems, he could provide for his parents... he was ready to create his own family.<br/><br/>So for him, to say that he was hung up on a girl ten minutes after meeting her?<br/>It was a big deal. <br/><br/><br/>She couldn't wait to see the girl who broke his strong resolve.<br/><br/><br/><br/>When they entered the gallery, she was the first thing Clarke noticed.<br/>She was standing next to Lincoln in front of one of his recent works talking animatedly about something Clarke couldn't hear from where she was standing.<br/>She was small, with long brown hair that followed her every movement, but she could feel the energy radiating from her in waves even meters away.<br/><br/>The second thing she noticed, was the look on her friends face; he was looking at this girl like she literally hung the moon.<br/><br/>Clarke smiled to herself.<br/>What was with her and her friends lately?<br/><br/>Lincoln and this girl he just met.<br/>Murphy and Raven. They'll sure as hell end up together sooner rather than later. <br/>And she with Bellamy. She was deeply attracted to him, needless to deny it.<br/><br/><br/>Speaking about Bellamy, he was looking around as if in a trance, eyes jumping from piece to piece as if wanting to register every detail he could. As if he feared he won't be returning here soon enough to look at all the works properly.<br/><br/>He was still scanning greedily the place when he seemed to register something and whipped his head to stare at the girl by Lincoln's side.  <br/><br/>He watched her incredulously for a few moments, paintings forgotten, and then "O?" </p>
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<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Bellamy? What are you doing here?"<br/><br/><br/><br/><em>Oh, now she was asking him that?!</em><br/><br/><br/><br/>When Clarke asked him if he wanted to follow her to the gallery, he was ecstatic. <br/>Initially, when she answered her phone and started talking with this Lincoln, he thought maybe he could be a boyfriend or something. <br/>A moron he was.<br/><br/>He knew Clarke sensed his change in behavior, so much so that at the end of the call she immediately told him who Lincoln was. <br/>It was incredible how easily they could read each other already.<br/><br/>In any case, when he entered the gallery all he wanted was to drown himself in Clarke's art for all the time possible. Learn and absorb everything he could about her work, about her.<br/>Offering him to see her works was a free pass to know more about her interests, her life. He knew that. And the fact that Clarke decided to make this step and open up with him this soon gave him infinite joy.<br/><br/>He was proud of her, and he didn't even know the reason.<br/><br/><br/>As soon as they arrived, His eyes begun scanning all the walls, ravenous, without focusing on anything in particular: he couldn't choose where to start.<br/>However, his bubble busted when his eyes landed on his little sister.<br/><br/>She was standing in front of a wide painting, not really giving any attention to it, but instead talking animatedly with a man that was clearly more interested in his sister than the painting too, as he was hanging on her every word.<br/><br/>But man wasn't the right definition for that caveman.<br/>He was big, tall, muscles everywhere, tattoos all over his arms, and he wasn't going to try and imagine where else he could have them.<br/><br/>Needless to say that Bellamy was fuming.<br/>What the hell was Octavia doing here? Making moony eyes at that viking of a man no less?<br/><br/><br/>"What are you doing here, Octavia? I thought you were out looking for a job?" He said, walking up to her.<br/><br/>She crossed her arms over her chest. "I am."<br/><br/>"Here?"<br/><br/>She nodded, excited. "Well, I came in because I was curious, then I found Lincoln and asked him if he knew someone who needed help in their activity. And I was so lucky! He told me he and his partner had in the plans to look for an assistant for this beautiful gallery!" <br/><br/>Lincoln, Clarke's not-boyfriend who was clearly interested in his little sister?<br/>"What a coincidence." He said flatly.<br/><br/>Clarke punched him in the arm. "Hey, that's true!" <br/><br/>"Sorry." He said, giving her an apologetic look while scratching the back of his neck. <br/><br/>Unfortunately, his sister picked up on his change in behavior immediately. "And you are?" She asked Clarke, suspicious.<br/><br/>"Manners, Octavia!" He scolded her.<br/><br/>Bellamy turned to Clarke then. "This is my sister, Octavia, although you probably already imagined that. O, this is Clarke."<br/><br/>"The partner." Interjected Clarke, extending her hand for Octavia to shake.<br/><br/>Octavia started approaching Clarke, only to stop mid step to cock an eyebrow at him. "Clarke?" She asked him.<br/><br/><em>Fuck.<br/><br/></em>"O-" He started, but it was too late.<br/><br/>"Clarke? The girl you have the hots for? Murphy's friend? That Clarke?"<br/><br/>"Octavia!"<br/><br/>The viking, Lincoln, suppressed a laugh.<br/><br/>"What? I didn't say anything, did I?" His sister asked innocently by Clarke's side.<br/><br/>"Well, it's good to see that your friends are as bad as mine." Clarke deadpanned, although he could see her cheeks turn a bright shade of pink. "Although this is your sister, but the feeling remains." She chuckled, finally shaking Octavia's hand.<br/><br/>"Oh, my friends are bad too, don't worry." He grunted.<br/><br/>At that, Clarke left Octavia's side to come up to him. "Don't worry Bellamy, I like you too." She reassured him, bumping her shoulder with his.<br/><br/>As soon as the words left her mouth though, she seemed to realize what she let slip out.<br/>She stared at him, blushing furiously, only to avert her gaze and quickly change the subject. "Ah, Bellamy, that's Lincoln, my partner and friend." She quickly stuttered.<br/><br/>Well, he preferred talking about how much Clarke liked him. And him her. Invite her for a night out, maybe?<br/>Anyway.<br/><br/>He was still smiling dumbly at her when vik-, eh, Lincoln, appeared at his side.<br/>"Nice to finally meet you Bellamy, I heard a lot about you."<br/><br/>"I don't doubt that." He answered, gripping his hand as hard as he could.<br/>Lincoln apparently was unfazed.<br/><br/>"See? Bad friends." Clarke huffed out, whipping Lincoln in the head when he snickered. She then turned to his sister, all business. "Octavia, are you really interested in this job?"<br/><br/>"Of course I am!" She replied.<br/><br/>"Think you can handle it?"<br/><br/>"With my eyes closed." She answered confidently.<br/><br/>She eyed his sister up and down, nodding. "Well then, welcome to Trikru."<br/><br/>"What?!" The three of them said in unison.<br/><br/>"Wow guys, it's like you rehearsed it." Laughed Clarke.<br/><br/>Three pair of eyes were watching her, waiting for an explanation.<br/>"Oh come on! I am sure Lincoln here already illustrated to you in details all the things we'll need from you, as well as salary and eventual. Haven't you?" She asked her friend, smirking.<br/><br/>Octavia patted him on the back. "Oh Bell, I like her." <br/><br/>Bellamy groaned. "Ok Octavia, time to go."<br/><br/><br/>Clarke clapped her hands, chuckling, and addressed his sister. "Give your number to Lincoln, he will text you as soon as we have the contract ready to sign. I think in a couple of days you'll be set to start."<br/><br/>Bellamy shot her a look. "Why don't you give her <em>your</em> number?"<br/><br/>"Well, she'll ask him for his anyway so why bother delaying the inevitable?" She answered, arching an eyebrow at him.<br/><br/>She was right. "Have you got some rules about dating an employee?"<br/><br/>"Why don't you stop it, Bellamy and ask Clarke for <em>her</em> number instead?!" His sister interjected, exasperated and mocking. <br/><br/><br/>He locked eyes with Clarke for a moment, and they both blushed. After a few seconds of stalling, they implicitly decided to ignore his sister's comment.<br/><br/>Clarke cleared her throat, pointing between her and Lincoln. "It's always been the two of us, so we didn't need rules." <br/><br/>"Restrictions?" He prayed.<br/><br/>"Nah. In any case," she continued "I think your sister is capable of making her own decisions, am I right?"<br/><br/>He let out a breath, defeated. "I tried."<br/><br/>"Overprotective." She coughed up.<br/><br/>He shot her a glare. "Am not."<br/><br/>She smiled at him, playful. "You so are!"<br/><br/>Octavia busted out laughing. "Damn, I am going to call you every time he'll try and tell me what to do I swear."<br/><br/>Bellamy rolled his eyes. The girls both smirked and started talking in hushed tones.<br/><br/><br/><br/>"And that right there, is a friendship we'll grow to be afraid of." He commented, mostly to himself.<br/><br/>"I was thinking the same thing. And wait until you meet Raven. Those three together? Man, if I had them, I'll already have gray hair." Lincoln said from beside him.<br/><br/>Bellamy tried and failed to stifle a laugh. "Yeah, I had a brief conversation with her." He said, careful to not let Clarke hear.<br/><br/>Lincoln patted him in the back. "I know. I am not going to threaten you, I promise."<br/><br/>"Thank god."<br/><br/>"Hey, I know we can seem a group of crazy, going around threatening people. But, It's not like that. It's not my place to tell but... We wouldn't have done all of this if we weren't sure she likes you."<br/><br/>Bellamy looked at him, surprised.<br/><br/>He shrugged. "Don't look at me like that. It's evident. And it was about time. We just care about her... and we protect our own, like you do with your sister."<br/><br/>All the animosity he had towards Lincoln left his body in an instant.<br/>In that moment he decided that he liked this man.<br/>He was loyal, a rare quality these days.<br/><br/>"The threatening is not worth it with you either, I see."<br/><br/>Lincoln gave him a sincere look. "It's not. The last thing you need to worry about is how I'll treat your sister."<br/><br/>Bellamy nodded. "I'll regret what I am about to say but... go to her, give her your number."<br/><br/>What was with him today?<br/>He just gave his permission to a man he didn't even know to ask his sister out on a date. His little sister. Since when was Bellamy this permissive?<br/><br/>"Thanks, man. And for Clarke... Be patient. One day, she'll open up and you'll understand her... wariness."<br/><br/><br/>He watched Lincoln go to Octavia and send Clarke his way.<br/><br/>"Hey, you sure about this?" He asked her as soon as she arrived at his side.<br/><br/>She smiled at him. "I am. I trust Lincoln. He may like Octavia as more than an assistant, but he wouldn't ask me to assume her if he wasn't sure she could do good here. Trikru is his life. So yeah, I am sure. Plus, she is a force of nature. I like her."<br/><br/>He gave her a big smile. "Ok then, thank you. But, if she bothers you, or if you understand she's the wrong person for the job-"<br/><br/>She put a hand on his arm. "Bellamy, stop. If the case comes, I won't go easy on her, be certain of that."<br/><br/>He let out a breath, gesturing between them. "Sorry. I just, I don't want to... loose this? If things with my sister'll go south." <br/><br/>She looked at him for a moment as if undecided about something, and he stood stock still when she pushed on her tiptoes to give him a kiss on the cheek. "I don't want to lose this either." She whispered, only for them to hear.<br/><br/><br/>Unfortunately, he didn't have the time to dwell on what just happened.<br/><br/><br/>"We have a bet going on, want to join?" He heard Lincoln whisper to Octavia.<br/><br/>Clarke snapped her gaze away from him to shot them a murderous look. "Careful on your answer Octavia, I could always change my mind about the job."<br/><br/>His sister immediately jumped away from Lincoln. "You wouldn't?!"<br/><br/>Clarke cocked an eyebrow at her. <br/><br/>"Ok Bell, we are going! See ya, boss!" Mock saluted his sister, waving at Lincoln and taking his hand to lead him out the door of the gallery. <br/><br/>He waved, shooting Clarke an amused look, which she replied to with a wink and a big smile of her own.<br/><br/><br/><em>Damn, this girl.</em></p>
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<p>As soon as the two left, Clarke and Lincoln watched each other and started laughing uncontrollably.<br/><br/>"We found a family uh?" Lincoln got out through giggles.<br/><br/>She punched him lightly in the chest. "That means I should start taking bets on you too?"<br/><br/>"Don't even try it!"<br/><br/>"Well you did, so why shouldn't I?" She deadpanned.<br/><br/>He thought about it for a moment and then sighed in defeat. "Touché."<br/><br/><br/>She was already typing on her phone.<br/><br/><strong><br/>"The Dropship Folks"<br/></strong><br/><br/><strong>Clarke 10:46 am:</strong><br/>I have an announcement<br/><br/><br/><strong>Monty 10:47 am:</strong><br/>Let me sleep<br/><br/><br/><strong>Jackson 10:47 am:</strong><br/>???<br/><br/><br/><strong>Rae 10:48 am:</strong><br/>If it isn't about your hot guy I don't want to hear it<br/><br/><br/><strong>Harp 10:49 am:<br/></strong>Rae don't be cocky, let her speak!<br/>@MONTY don't go back to sleep baby I am making you pancakes<br/><br/><br/><strong>Clarke 10:50 am:</strong><br/>Thanks, Harp<br/>and actually… it's even better.<br/>Our baby Linc found love today!<br/><br/><br/><br/>Lincoln pulled her hair. She shooed him away. "Hey!" <br/><br/>"Stop it, please. They are going to explode when you tell them."<br/><br/>"That's the plan."<br/><br/>"Come on, you were in this situation just a couple of days ago, you know what it's like!" <br/><br/>She smiled sweetly at him. "Exactly."<br/><br/>"You are a horrible person."<br/><br/>"I think at the end of this conversation you're going to regret making fun of me about Bellamy." She sang, showing him her phone and going to read their friends reply.<br/><br/><br/><br/><strong>"The Dropship folks"<br/><br/><br/>Rae 10:50 am:</strong><br/>how<br/><br/><br/><strong>Jackson 10:51 am:</strong><br/>where<br/><br/><br/><strong>Harp 10:51 am:</strong><br/>Wonderful! Who is she? We know her?<br/><br/><br/><strong>Clarke 10:52 am:</strong><br/>We gave her a job like ten minutes ago.<br/><br/><br/><strong>Harp 10:52 am:</strong><br/>A job?<br/><br/><br/><strong>Linc 10:54 am:</strong><br/>Please... I know it's not in your nature (Jasper), but don't freak out...<br/>I repeat: don't freak out<br/><br/><br/><strong>Monty 10:55 am:</strong><br/>Jas will prob sleep through it all considering we closed at 3 in the morning, so don't worry.<br/>But, now I am freaking out<br/><br/><br/><strong>Jackson 10:56 am:</strong><br/>Yeah man, you shouldn't say these things<br/><br/><br/><strong>Rae 10:57 am:</strong><br/>For fuck's sake give us a name<br/><br/><br/><strong>Clarke 10:59 am:</strong><br/>Ok guys<br/>First I want you to know that I am taking bets on this one<br/><br/><br/><strong>Jackson 11:00 am:</strong><br/>IN IN IN<br/><br/><br/><strong>Rae 11:00 am:</strong><br/>Oh god, we are all in obviously! Now talk!<br/><br/><br/><strong>Harp 11:01 am:</strong><br/>Yeah, count on Mont and me too<br/><br/><br/><strong>Linc 11:03 am:</strong><br/>You guys are evils<br/><br/><br/><strong>Clarke 11:04 am:</strong><br/>AND that said...<br/>You guys don't know her but... some of you might know her brother<br/><br/><br/><strong>Monty 11:04 am:</strong><br/>No way<br/><br/><br/><strong>Rae 11:04 am:</strong><br/>Come again<br/><br/><br/><strong>Clarke 11:05 am:</strong><br/>... It's Bellamy's sister<br/><br/><br/><strong>Jackson 11:05 am:</strong><br/>Where the fuck am I when all this shit happens<br/><br/><br/><strong>Harp 11:06 am</strong><br/>@JACKSON studying to save lives my friend<br/>YOU GUYSSSS!!!<br/>I am so happy for the both of you!<br/><br/><br/><strong>Rae 11:06 am:</strong><br/>the fuck I am waiting Wednesday for dinner night<br/>I need details like yesterday<br/><br/><br/><strong>Monty 11:07 am:</strong><br/>same here<br/>beer on the house at dropship tonight, it's an order</p>

<p></p><div>
  <p><br/><strong>Jackson 11:07 am</strong><br/>I feel slightly better, thanks Harp<br/>Going into surgery, see u tonight<br/><br/></p>
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  <p> </p>
  <p>They set a time for their dinner night and resumed placing some appointments with a couple of new artists that asked for some space in the gallery to show their works.</p>
  <p>"Just wait until Jasper reads it all..." Clarke said mischievous, going through their agenda.</p>
  <p>"Man, I really hope he just skips all the conversation to the point where we talk about dinner night."</p>
  <p>"And throw all at him tonight? For the first time? In person?"</p>
  <p>"Fuck, I don't know which one is better."</p>
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  <p>They were eating a sandwich for lunch when both their phones went off repeatedly.<br/>Lincoln shot her a glare, picking up his phone. "Here we go."<br/>She chuckled and went to his side to read with him.<br/><br/><br/></p>
  <p>
    <strong>"The Dropship folks"<br/><br/></strong>
  </p>
  <p><strong>Jas 13:29 pm:</strong><br/>WAIT WHAT<br/>THIS IS INSANE<br/><br/></p>
  <p><strong>Jas 13:31 pm:</strong><br/>Double bet<br/>Double wedding<br/>Double uncle Jasper<br/><br/></p>
  <p><strong>Jas 13:35 pm:</strong><br/>I AM NOT FREAKING OUT OK U ARE<br/><br/><br/><br/>She opened her mouth to speak but Lincoln cut her off. "Don't. I don't want to hear it."</p>
  <p>"Hey, I am in this too, remember?"</p>
  <p>"Yes, but this was your idea."</p>
  <p>"They would've found out sooner rather than later, and you know it. It's better this way, at least they'll have until tonight to freak out."</p>
  <p>He threw an arm around her and ruffled her hair. "Ah, you are right. At least we'll face them together."</p>
  <p>She hummed. "That we'll do."</p>
  <p>They returned to their lunch.</p>
  <p> </p>
  <p>"So, you brought Bellamy with you to the gallery. This means you went to the café this morning?" He asked, with a mouthful of sandwich.</p>
  <p>She nodded. "I did."</p>
  <p>"What made you change your mind?"</p>
  <p>She considered her reply. "Honestly? I don't know. I just- since I met him I thought about him. He seems really nice, and kind and... for months I tried to put myself out there again, and I failed, every time. With him, I don't know why, but it all comes so easily."</p>
  <p>Lincoln shot her a look. She laughed. "Ok ok, easier?"</p>
  <p>"Yeah, that's better. Continue."</p>
  <p>"Not much more to say. Murphy and Raven gave me a pep talk yesterday, and I decided. On instinct. And this morning, when you called me? I was about to leave the café and internally I was like - I really don't want to say goodbye to him so soon - so I decided to ask him to come with me."</p>
  <p>Lincoln's eyes widened at that. "You did? I thought he offered."</p>
  <p>She shook her head. "No, I asked him."</p>
  <p>He smiled at her. "Well that's amazing Clarke. I am really proud of you. I know when you set your mind about something you go for it but this, this is on another level entirely. For so long you restrained yourself, and now, for you to follow your instinct and go for it? This is a big deal. Even for a little thing like asking him to follow you here." </p>
  <p>"Wow. You put some thought in it?" She joked, giggling.</p>
  <p>"I am just so happy that you are opening up again. And thinking about it, it's not even a little thing, you asked him to see your art. Your art. That's astonishing my friend."</p>
  <p>She put the remnants of her sandwich on his plate, and he picked at it immediately. "Thanks, Linc." She said softly.</p>
  <p> </p>
  <p>Lincoln's words instilled confidence in her.<br/>It was true, she followed her instinct deciding to go to the café and later asking Bellamy to go with her to the gallery. And even if she was happy with the result, she still had doubts.<br/>It was her nature.<br/>She couldn't change from day to night.</p>
  <p>The morning went well, surprisingly so.</p>
  <p>Bellamy was so much better than she expected. He was a giant dork. But a sweet dork. He was funny, easy to talk to, and caring.<br/>She could see it in the way he talked about his sister and his friends. The way he reassured her that she could count on him even if they weren't close, it was just as unbelievable as the fact that she believed him without beating an eye. In fact, her initial reaction at his words, her insecurity, it didn't depend on his forward speech, but on the fact that in reversed situations she could have said the same things to him, she had no doubts about that. It scared her a little.</p>
  <p>She shook her head to wash bad thoughts away from her mind.<br/>She didn't want to ruin the good mood she was in.</p>
  <p>Suddenly, she remembered that she kissed Bellamy in the cheek. She also told him that she liked him. <br/>What the hell was happening to her?! Since when she was so little in control of her thoughts?</p>
  <p>This was Bellamy's fault, without a doubt. <br/>When she was around him, her brain short circuited.</p>
  <p>What give her confidence was that it seemed to go both ways.<br/>How was even possible that a guy like him liked a girl like her?<br/>She smiled to herself.</p>
  <p> </p>
  <p>"So," Lincoln interrupted her train of thoughts. "do you think in a couple of weeks we'll go on double dates together? 'Cause if I have to see you wear that dopey face every time you see him, I have to start to prepare myself as soon as possible."</p>
  <p>She flipped him off, standing and going toward the store room.<br/>"I'll have to attend to you shooting moony eyes at her from now on, so I think we are even!"</p>
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<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>That night, dinner with her friends was crazy as usual.</p><p></p><div>
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  <div><p><br/>Dinner night was usually picked between Mondays and Wednesdays, mostly because they didn't know when Jackson would have a free night from the hospital, so they always kept two possibilities open.<br/>On Monday nights The Dropship was open exclusively for their little family. Monty and Jasper offered up the place and drinks, and the others provided food.<br/><br/><br/>Both Clarke and Lincoln took their time getting to the café, but as soon as they arrived, they were the center of attention.<br/>Their friends sat them at their usual table, put two beers in their hands and started shooting question after question at them, so much so that after an hour they attempted an escape from the back door only to be found by Jasper that was clearly waiting for them with a knowing smirk. They were ushered back inside and the third grade resumed like it was never interrupted.<br/><br/><br/>She finally had the opportunity to scold her friends for all the ambushes at Bellamy, and at least they had the decency to look a little embarrassed. <br/>And yes, she had heard Bellamy tell Lincoln that Raven threatened him too, in a way that was still unknown to her. After dwelling on it all the afternoon, she decided that for the time being she wouldn't ask an explanation at her friend.<br/>She was grateful for their protectiveness, but seriously, all of them? She wasn't a five years old.<br/><br/>It was absurd how much they were excited for them both; for Lincoln, because it was pretty clear that he was half in love with Octavia already, and for her, for obvious reasons, as her unwillingness to open up more and meet new people.<br/><br/>However, she had to admit that hear how much her friends were proud and happy for her for putting herself on the line again, gave her a lightness she had long lacked.<br/><br/><br/>The problem was that the lightness she was feeling was in contrast with the insecurity and doubts that were by then a fixed point in her mind.<br/><br/><br/><br/>In the days that followed, she met Bellamy for breakfast every morning.<br/>They never set a date or time, but they seemed to gravitate towards each other anyway.<br/>Some mornings, like when Bellamy had a lesson early at the high school or when she had to meet with a client, it was just a quick chat, other mornings instead they had the time to sit and talk for who knows how long.<br/><br/>That was, if Jasper and Monty didn't decide on imposing themselves on them, obviously. <br/>They were cute and all, but after the third day they claimed to have enough employee to cover for them, she threatened them to change place if they didn't give them some space.<br/>They got the message. From then on, they let them be, more or less. They were Jasper and Monty, after all.<br/><br/><br/>Sat in front of Bellamy with a cup of coffee and a muffin or a slice of pie depending on the day, she listened intently to everything Bellamy told her about his life.<br/>She discovered (but it was nothing new really) that he was a giant nerd: he absolutely loved history books, but everything that was a book or history related really, on quiet nights he liked to sit on his couch and watch documentaries (who still did that?), and according to Murphy and Octavia, who joined them for breakfast one morning, watching a film with him that related even remotely to something historical was a hazard because apparently he felt the need to point out all the inaccuracies on screen without giving the others the possibility to actually see and understand something.<br/><br/>He was so invested in his job, talking about the lecture he was going to do, describing her his students, one time he even quoted to her some of the most well written works. He was so proud of them, and he just arrived at the school. She couldn't wait to see where he'll be a year from now. <br/>In fact, when he told her Jaha offered him to teach an extracurricular course starting from September, she pushed him to accept; he was one of the lucky ones, the ones that found the job they were meant to do and were constantly stimulated by. He shouldn't pass up on an occasion like that.<br/><br/>She learned that along with studying to become a teacher and all the side-jobs he had to do to grant himself the privilege of studying, he mostly raised his sister by himself, although whenever the argument came on he stiffened a bit, so she never pushed. It wasn't like she hadn't arguments of her own she didn't want to talk about. She wasn't in a rush. They had time.<br/><br/><br/>More than once she found herself entranced by his speeches.<br/>Watching him speak about his life, his friends and his work, the way he seemed to talk not only with words but with his body. His mimic, his gestures, his passion, his voice; she couldn't help but wish to see one of his lectures one day. <br/><br/><br/>In all that, she too had the opportunity to open up a bit more about her interests, telling him about her art, argument he seemed enraptured by. He listened intently when she recounted him that initially, she was supposed to become a surgeon like her mother, and that it was her father who pushed her to pursue her dream to become an artist.<br/><br/>Clarke let him understand implicitly that she wasn't in good terms with her mother, mentioning her decision to apply for art school instead of med school was a big argument of debate for her. If only.<br/><br/>If he noted she didn't talk about her father, he didn't mention it. Besides, he didn't mention any of his parents either.<br/><br/><br/>They mostly let the other speak, jumping in from time to time to ask a question or an elucidation about something.<br/><br/><br/>Clarke felt deeply connected to him already.<br/><br/>He was so respectful of her, never pushing for anything more that what they had in that moment, going along with her in every step, letting her take the lead of the progress of whatever was that was starting between them.<br/><br/><br/>And what made her ecstatic and worried at the same time, was that they could read each other so easily. <br/><br/>They picked up in the change in moods of the other instantly, they sensed when the other didn't want to talk about something, and they had always the answer ready whenever the other asked a question. Sometimes, just a look or a certain type of smile told her what Bellamy was thinking.<br/><br/><br/>Ah, Bellamy's smiles... <br/>She could list them by heart already.<br/><br/>She wasn't obsessed, she was just an artist, ok?<br/>Observing was her job.<br/>Anyway.<br/><br/><br/>But who was she kidding. In the end, it was inevitable for her: she started drawing him.<br/>Page after page, she fulfilled her sketchbook with Bellamy's face, hands, eyes, smile. <br/>He was a really nice subject to draw.<br/>And she was a perfectionist, so it was totally normal to keep drawing him 'til she got the dimple in his chin and the scar on his lip just right, or the way his curls fell on his face, or the smirk he did every time he called her princess. <br/>Nickname that she learned to grow fond of. He gave it to her, how could she not?<br/><br/><br/><br/>After nearly two weeks of "breakfast with Bellamy" (funny, it could be the title of a soap opera), they finally set a date for him to come see the gallery.<br/>The plan was to meet up for breakfast like any other day, then Bellamy would go to the high school for his morning lessons, and he'll bring a salad for them to eat at the gallery around lunchtime.<br/>Clarke didn't set any appointment for the afternoon, so she wasn't expecting anyone at the gallery. She'll spend the morning in her study searching for inspiration, and she'll have an entire afternoon to dedicate to Bellamy.<br/><br/><br/>But obviously plans don't always go as one expects.<br/><br/><br/>That morning, she was just entering her shower when her phone chirped with an incoming text.<br/><br/><br/><strong>Abigail Griffin 7:14 am:</strong><br/>Good morning Clarke,<br/>I am sending Mr Wollace's son to your gallery for a commission.<br/>He should be there in about two hours.<br/>Treat him well.<br/><br/><em><br/>Typical</em>, she thought, rolling her eyes.<br/><br/>That wasn't new for her mother. From time to time, she would send some high rank friend of hers, because she was sure Clarke couldn't sustain herself without her mother's rich friends giving her commissions.<br/><br/><br/>That was what remained about her relationship with her mother: terse messages and a call once a month or on each other's birthday. Oh, and Christmas. Christmas' lunch at the Griffin mansion was a must.<br/><br/><br/>She didn't waste time for a reply.<br/><br/><br/>She instead decided to text Bellamy to cancel their meet up at the café.<br/>It was the first time one canceled on the other, she had to let him know.<br/>Clarke sent him a quick text before finally entering the shower.<br/><br/><br/>She then proceeded to dress up especially well, 'cause Abby Griffin's friends expected a renewed artist to receive them and not a girl that from time to time received her clients in shorts and a big shirt from her father's because she was surprised painting.<br/><br/>So, needless to say that meeting up with someone sent by her mother required to put on her best dress, high heels, and have her makeup and hair neatly styled.<br/>It this case she went for a light blue dress that hugged her curves but didn't show much cleavage thanks to the high neckline, and paired it with a pair of high black heels. Simple but formal.<br/><br/>She put on some light makeup on her eyes and lips, nothing even remotely heavy, it was daylight after all.<br/>She arranged her hair in a sophisticated twisted low bun that her mother taught her when she was like, eight.<br/>Clarke was sitting on her bed putting her heels on when her phone lighted up.<br/><br/><br/><strong>Bellamy Blake 8:06 am:</strong><br/>'Morning, Princess.<br/>Thanks for the heads up and good luck with the client!<br/>Don't worry, see you soon.<br/><br/><br/>She smiled to herself and went to stand in front of her floor length mirror, assessing herself.<br/><em>That's enough</em>, she thought.<br/><br/><br/><br/>Mr Wollace's son, Cage, was... <br/>Clarke had no other definition for him than creepy.<br/><br/><br/>He showed up exactly at the stroke of the two hours mark set by her mother, dressed in a beige suit and walking with a security only a rich self-centered with the stench under his nose could have.<br/><br/>She decided in that moment that she wasn't going to welcome him at the door like she would do with any other client, he would come to her. She was at the reception desk after all. So she busied herself with the gallery's agenda.<br/><br/>He didn't wait long to let himself known.<br/>"Miss Griffin! What a pleasure." He began, approaching her.<br/><br/>Taking her time, Clarke finished scribbling some nonsense on the agenda and closed it, lifting her eyes to him. "Mr Wollace, I assume?"<br/><br/>Without giving her a reply, he took her hand from the desk and kissed it. "Please, call me Cage."<br/><br/>She shivered, taking her hand back and nodding.<br/>She didn't like this man.<br/><br/>"Beautiful flowers for a beautiful lady." With that, he gave her what Clarke only in that moment noted was in his other hand: a bouquet of roses.<br/><br/>"Thank you, Mr Wollace, but I can't accept them. I didn't do anything." She replied politely.<br/><br/>"Miss Griffin, I insist. I pray you to accept this gift in thanks to having set a meeting with such a short notice."<br/><br/>Reluctantly, she accepted the bouquet.<br/><br/>"Your mother told me you would love them." He said, winking at her.<br/><br/>Really?<br/>She was allergic to roses.<br/>To prove her point, she sneezed.<br/><br/><em>Wonderful.</em><br/><br/>Clarke put the bouquet on the reception desk and decided to start talking business. The sooner she found out what Wollace wanted from her, the sooner he'll leave.<br/>"So, Mr Wollace. What can I do for you?"<br/><br/>He looked at her up and down, giving her a predatory smile. "So many things, Miss Griffin."<br/><br/>It was official: his stares made her skin crawl.<br/>But she wasn't about to let it show.<br/><br/>She ignored his sassy remark, trying to keep her composure. "Are you in need of a painting or a mural?"<br/><br/>"Actually, both."<br/><br/>She sighed internally. Of course, he needed both. "What can you tell me about the subject?"<br/><br/>He had a glint in his eyes when he started speaking. "Well, as you probably already know, I am about to open a Casino in Polis. I recruited the best engineers and architects, as well as the best designers. We are almost ready to bring the furniture inside. But before that, I want you to design and paint one of the walls. The idea is to reproduce the Hollywood Boulevard at night. The heart of Los Angeles."<br/><br/>Well, at least it wasn't a self-portrait. "I can do that. What about the painting?"<br/><br/>Cage leaned against the reception desk, leaning towards her. "The painting'll be a self-portrait that'll be showed in the center of the Casino."<br/><br/>Well duh. <br/><br/>"Then it's settled. You can send me the details about the self-portrait, I'll give you the contacts. And as for the mural, if you could give me the measurements of the wall in question, I'll send you a sketch as soon as possible. If you have any particular requests, you can send them to me."<br/><br/>No need to talk money with this people. Any amount she'll set, they'll always offer more, just because they could, and they had to prove it. No doubt Cage was no different. Clarke gave him a business card with the contacts of the gallery. No way in hell she would give him her personal contacts.<br/><br/><br/>Apparently, he had a different idea.<br/><br/>He took her business card, deliberately brushing his fingers against hers. She had to restrain herself not to tense up at the act. <br/><br/>"Actually why don't you let me see some of your works? Just to get an idea. Then you could start to sketch the mural with my inputs? I have some hours to spare. You know, I cleared out my agenda for you."<br/><br/><br/>The problem was, anyone was coming to her rescue.<br/><br/>Lincoln was scouting an art fair in a city nearby today, and brought Octavia along with him to give her an idea about what type of artists she should set her eyes open for.<br/><br/><br/>So, until Bellamy's arrival, Clarke was alone.<br/><br/><br/>She wouldn't let her mother's friends near her or her gallery anymore, that was for sure.<br/><br/>But right now, she couldn't say no. So she gave him a tight smile and reluctantly accepted to show him around.<br/>Painting after painting, Clarke found herself explaining to a very false interested Cage that grasped any occasion to step closer to her and give her all the attentions she definitely never asked for, the life and story of every painting. <br/><br/>Repulsing the thought of finding herself alone in her study with Wollace, she described every piece meticulously, even showing him some of Lincoln's works. She found herself to check the clock behind the reception desk more often than not. She hoped that prick didn't notice. After nearly an hour, she couldn't stall anymore. She led him inside her study, and began to prepare her work space.<br/><br/><br/>Clarke settled an easel in the center of the room, a small table in the left, where she placed some pencils and a sketchbook. She then placed two stools, one in front of the easel for her, and the other a good two foots to her right. "Please, sit." She told Cage.<br/><br/>He brought out his phone, pulling up a picture and showing it to her. "I was thinking we could start from here." She watched the picture distractedly, and immediately started sketching. She wanted him to leave like, right now.<br/><br/>Wollace gave her ten minutes of peace and silence before moving his stool next to Clarke's, bringing him shoulder to shoulder with her, to point up at something she had only just put into paper but that needed his undivided attention.<br/>She tensed.<br/><br/><em>Be calm, Clarke. Just a little longer. You can do this.<br/><br/><br/></em>Or maybe not.<br/><br/>After the fourth time Cage invaded her space and put his arm around her to point something out, uninvited, she couldn't take it anymore.<br/><br/>Here alone with him, she wasn't comfortable, and she was definitely nervous about the situation. She couldn't even concentrate on a fucking sketch. It was her job, for fuck's sake!<br/><br/><br/>It was settled. She was calling Bellamy.<br/>But how?<br/><br/><br/>And probably someone was on her side today after all, because in that moment Wollace's phone went off.<br/>"Excuse me sweetie, I have to take it." He whispered in her ear sultrily, squeezing her shoulder and stepping up"<br/><br/><em>What the hack?!<br/><br/><br/></em>She brushed him off, sending him an irritated look, but he only smirked in return, answering the call.<br/><br/>As soon ad he stepped on the hallway she flew up and run to the couch, taking her phone out of her purse to contact Bellamy.<br/><br/><br/>She didn't want to alarm him, but only the thought of spending another two hours with that creep of a man gave her chills. So she sent him a quick text asking if they could anticipate their meeting.<br/><br/><br/>Clarke just hoped he could come sooner rather than later.<br/><br/><br/><br/><br/><br/></p><hr/>
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        <p>Bellamy woke up to the sound of an incoming text on his phone.</p>
        <p> </p>
        <p><strong>Princess 7:21 am:<br/></strong>Good Morning!<br/>Sorry but I won't make it to The Dropship,<br/>a client requested a meeting asap, not negotiable.<br/>I'll wait for you at the gallery later today!<br/>Sorry</p>
        <p> </p>
        <p>Without the need to hurry up to get to the café anymore, Bellamy took his time getting up, stirring in bed and thinking about Clarke.</p>
        <p> </p>
        <p>They were taking it slow. He didn't want to scare her away, and he certainly wasn't in a rush. He was loving every little meet up with her, getting to know her piece by piece over a cup of coffee and a slice of cake. He didn't know if his decisions would bring them in the right direction, but she seemed so at ease with him, he couldn't do anything but think that he was indeed doing something good.</p>
        <p> </p>
        <p>Sure, at times it was hard to do it with her noisy friends always in the way, but he had to admit he was starting to grow fond of her weird group of friends, and it was hard to avoid them, or at least Monty and Jasper were. The place was theirs after all.</p>
        <p>In addiction to that, in a short time Clarke had already become a pillar in his sister's life. From the moment O started working at the gallery, he knew she found her place. That first day she came home with a wide smile and made his and Murphy's ears bleed from how much she talked about her new job. He didn't even have to drag her out of bed anymore in the mornings. He suspected a big part in all of this was played by Lincoln, but he wasn't going to dwell on it. If his sister was happy, so was Bellamy.</p>
        <p>Bellamy smiled to himself, brushing his teeth while typing a quick reply to Clarke.</p>
        <p>He decided not to change his routine, so he went to the café and chatted a bit with the two owners before getting to the high school.</p>
        <p> </p>
        <p>Bellamy was just past the first half of his lesson when his phone vibrated in his pocket.</p>
        <p>He wasn't going to look, that's for sure, but he couldn't deny that until the end of the lecture, an uneasy feeling settled over him.</p>
        <p>As soon as he heard the doorbell rang, he picked up his phone.</p>
        <p> </p>
        <p><strong>Princess 10:24 am:<br/></strong>Think you could come here as soon as the lesson ends?<br/>Please</p>
        <p> </p>
        <p>Bellamy sat the phone on his desk slowly.<br/>That was odd.</p>
        <p>Clarke told him a few days ago that she cleared her schedule to have all the afternoon free... maybe another important client requested a meeting?<br/>Well, he wasn't going to dwell on it. If she asked him to anticipate their... meeting? Date? What should he call it?<br/>Anyway, if she was asking him that, it certainly was for a good reason.</p>
        <p> </p>
        <p>Deciding not to waste any more time, in an unlike Professor Blake way, he started picking up his things right away, not giving his students the chance to come up to him for questions.<br/>However, lifting his eyes he noticed one of his students, Charlotte, looking at him with doubts in her eyes. He gave her a gentle smile. "Can I help you, Charlotte?"</p>
        <p>"I am sorry Mr Blake, can I ask you a couple of questions? I want to make sure I write the essay in the best way possible..."</p>
        <p>If that was even a question. He couldn't say no to his students. He motioned her to his desk. "Of course, come here. Unfortunately, we'll have to make it quick because I can't stay for long today."</p>
      </div>
    </div>
  </div>
  <div>
    <p><br/>She nodded, hurrying up to his desk. "I'll be very quick!"</p>
    <p> </p>
    <p> </p>
    <p>By the time he was able to hit the road to Trikru, it was just half past eleven. He managed to stop by The Dropship to pick up two salads and then hit the road again.</p>
    <p> </p>
    <p>When he entered the gallery with the code Clarke gave him the previous day, there wasn't anyone in sight.</p>
    <p>He looked around, confused, and was about to take his phone from his pocket to call her when he heard a voice coming from his left. A male voice. He turned in its direction and saw a door just behind the reception desk, on top of whom he could see a bouquet of roses.</p>
    <p>What the hell was going on?</p>
    <p> </p>
    <p>Reaching the door, he found himself at the beginning of a hallway. He started walking down the corridor, following the voice. The first door to his right was labeled "PRIVATE". He also passed a "BATHROOM" and a "STORE ROOM". At the end of the hallway, there were two doors, facing each other. The one to his right had Lincoln name's on it. His study maybe? That meant the other was probably Clarke's. </p>
    <p>"Mr Wollace, this is the third time your father is requesting your presence, maybe you should go?" He heard Clarke say, and he immediately turned the other way around, founding the door was slightly ajar. He furrowed his brows. She seemed almost... edgy.</p>
  </div>
  <div>
    <p><br/>"I already told you sweetie, I'll go when I want to go. You are more important than my father, aren't you?"</p>
    <p> </p>
    <p>Bellamy tensed up.</p>
    <p>Paying attention to not let himself known he poked his head through the door, assessing the situation. It felt like a déjà vu: founding Clarke at her easel brought to his memory the first time he found her teaching the art class at the high school.</p>
    <p>The differences?</p>
    <p>If the first time, without even knowing her he could see how happy and at ease she was, now, here in what he could only assume was her study, it was evident there was something wrong in her.<br/>He could see how tense and rigid she was.</p>
    <p>And he could even understand why when his eyes registered an arm around her shoulders that belonged to a man standing beside her, clearly too close for comfort.</p>
    <p>Mr Wollace, as Clarke called him, was wearing a suit that probably costed more than all Bellamy's wardrobe put together, and an attitude that made Bellamy hate him without giving him the benefit of the doubt.</p>
    <p> </p>
    <p>That was definitely the reason she asked him to come earlier than established.</p>
    <p>Without wasting any time to think about what he was going to say, he knocked on the door and stepped into the room, letting himself known. "Babe, sorry for the delay, kids kept me longer than - oh sorry, should I wait outside 'til you are done?" He said, pretending he didn't already know that ass was bothering Clarke.</p>
  </div>
  <div>
    <p>And yeah, needless to say he was pretty shocked for a moment when it registered what he just said.</p>
    <p><em>The boyfriend's card Bellamy, really?</em> </p>
  </div>
  <div>
    <p>Well, too late now, he was going to roll with it. But how was Clarke going to react?</p>
    <p> </p>
    <p>Relief washed over her features as soon as she heard his voice, and that was answer enough for him.<br/>As he placed the bags with their lunch on the couch, she shook Wollace away from her and put her pencil on the table. "Bell! No need. Come here, I'd like to introduce you to Mr Wollace, a new client of the gallery."</p>
    <p>Ignoring completely the way The Creep jumped away from Clarke, and the fact that she just called him "Bell" or that he liked how his name sounded coming from her mouth a little too much, Bellamy approached Clarke and gave her a kiss on the forehead.</p>
    <p>"Hey, Princess." He said, hugging her to his side. She wasted no time leaning into him.</p>
    <p>"Hey. Thank you for bringing lunch." She told him, giving him a meaningful look. He knew right away she wasn't really thanking him for the food.</p>
    <p>"Don't mention it. I texted to tell you I was coming, if I had known you were busy I would have waited outside."</p>
    <p>She gave him a questioning look. "Oh? My phone is in the purse over there, I mustn't have heard it. Sorry."</p>
    <p>Bellamy gave her a playful smile that she immediately reciprocated. They were good at this game.</p>
    <p> </p>
    <p>It was only when he heard Wollace clear his throat that Bellamy snapped his gaze away from Clarke's to look at him.</p>
    <p>"And you are?" He said, clearly annoyed.</p>
    <p>Bellamy ignored the remark. "Again, sorry! I had to introduce myself right away. Mr Wollace, right? A pleasure to meet you. I am Bellamy Blake, Clarke's boyfriend." He said, naive, shaking his hand.</p>
  </div>
  <div>
    <p></p>
    <div>
      <p>Without giving Bellamy a second glance, he stood from his stool and addressed Clarke. "Well, Miss Griffin, my father is requesting my presence and unfortunately, I can't delay the inevitable anymore."</p>
      <p>Clarke nodded, standing. "All right then, I'll show you to the exit." She motioned for him to follow her.</p>
      <p>Unsure of what to do with himself, Bellamy watched them go. </p>
      <p>"Thank you for your courtesy, Miss Griffin. In the meanwhile, we'll talk all the details of the commission."</p>
      <p>As soon as he saw Wollace put his hand on the small of Clarke's back, Bellamy was already on the move.</p>
      <p>However, he should have known Clarke didn't need his help. She extricated herself from Wollace and replied to him in a clipped voice.<br/>"Actually, you'll talk details with my assistant and partner, Lincoln. He'll be ready to walk you through everything we'll need."</p>
      <p>"Wonderful." He heard Wollace saying through his teeth, disappointed.</p>
      <p>Clarke then turned to him. "Bell, will you start settling lunch please? I'll be right back." She said, winking, reassuring him really.</p>
      <p>"Under orders, princess." He mock saluted, giving her a crooked smile.</p>
      <p> </p>
      <p>He couldn't help following them from afar though. Just to make sure she didn't need him.</p>
      <p>Lunch forgotten still in the bags, he impatiently waited for them to exit the hallway to follow. He stopped just behind the entry of the gallery, watching as Clarke shook hands with Wollace and finally closed the door after him. </p>
      <p>Hiding behind the door, he had a moment to study her: in the short time they've known each other, he never saw her looking like this. Elegant, self-confident, almost austere, in a way. Always beautiful.</p>
      <p> </p>
      <p>How many things about her, he still didn't know?</p>
      <p> </p>
      <p>She took a few seconds to breathe deeply, massaging her temples.<br/>Then, she straightened up and started walking towards him.</p>
      <p>Bellamy quickly sprinted back to her study and started settling lunch.</p>
    </div>
  </div>
  <div>
    <p> </p>
    <p> </p>
    <p> </p>
    <p></p>
    <div>
      <p>"Your assistant Lincoln?" He asked as soon as she came back, quirking an eyebrow at her.</p>
      <p>"Well, I thought you wouldn't want Octavia anywhere near that man."</p>
      <p>Bellamy nodded enthusiastically, giving her a glass of water. "Well done."</p>
      <p> </p>
      <p>He guided her to the couch, and motioned for her to sit.</p>
      <p>"You all right?" </p>
      <p>Sagging on the cushions, she emptied her glass, closed her eyes and nodded. "Yeah. Just give me a minute."</p>
      <p>He could do that.</p>
      <p>Putting his hands in his pockets, he looked around the room finally taking in her study. Totally white walls, without decors, the only color came from the light gray couch she was currently sat on, and a desk that had probably seen better days if Bellamy had to say so himself. Besides a small corner where all her art supplies stood, what really gave color to the room were all the sketches, canvas and paintings scattered everywhere around the room in a disorder almost ordered. He also registered various sketchbooks. One of them stood out among the others for it's color: if all the other sketchbooks were in various shades of brown and worn out from overuse, this was dark blue and it was clear that it was kept almost reverently. Trying to change the subject, but mainly because he was curious, he asked her about it.<br/>"Is that your sketchbook?"</p>
      <p>"One of the many." She said distractedly, her eyes still closed.</p>
      <p>"Can I take a look at it?" </p>
      <p>Her eyes snapped open at his question, alarmed. "No! Uhm, I don't, I'm not-"</p>
      <p>"Hey, stop, I didn't want to make you uncomfortable."</p>
      <p>She looked at him, fidgeting, with a mix of shyness and nervousness that he couldn't quite place. "I am sorry, It's just... that's the sketchbook I care about the most. It's all personal stuff in there. Friends, family..."</p>
      <p>"Friends? That means I could be in there too?" He said, playful.</p>
      <p>She stood up from the couch, flushing bright red and clearing her throat, avoiding his eyes.<br/>"Can- can you give me a minute? I'll be right back." </p>
      <p>She disappeared in the hallway without giving him time to reply.</p>
      <p> </p>
      <p>Bellamy followed her with his eyes, shocked.<br/>That was definitely a yes, wasn't it? <br/>He looked at the offending sketchbook, trying to imagine if she really thought he was so important to be put in there, between her friends and family.</p>
      <p>He heard Clarke coming back even before seeing her.<br/>She was quickly passing from distressed to angry.<br/>"Sorry! I can't stand to be this overdressed in daylight, moreover for that shit of a human being! And he claimed my mother told him to buy me roses, I am allergic to roses!! What a creepy dick-"</p>
      <p>She was muttering, clearly still angry, but beside registering she was allergic to roses (for eventual future needs obviously) he couldn't focus on her words.<br/>How could he?</p>
      <p> </p>
      <p>If he thought that seeing Clarke in a dress, even angry, was a sight to behold, he was definitely wrong.<br/>Seeing her breathless and sulky in a pair of jean shorts and a baggy t-shirt three times her size that no way belonged to her, with her hair wild where she freed them from the intricate updo they were only moments earlier...</p>
      <p>Yeah, he was a goner.</p>
      <p> </p>
      <p>She was still rumbling, and he was still dazed, when she stopped abruptly to look at him, suspicious. "What?"</p>
      <p>Without giving much thought to it, he came up to her, placed his hands on either side of her face and brushed his lips against hers, giving her a soft kiss. "You are just beautiful." He murmured, simply.</p>
    </div>
  </div>
  <div>
    <p> </p>
    <p> </p>
    <p></p>
    <div>
      <p><br/>Fuck, what had he just done?!</p>
    </div>
    <div>
      <p>
        <em>You are not pretending to be her boyfriend anymore, Bellamy!</em>
      </p>
    </div>
    <div>
      <p>
        <em>So much for putting her at ease!</em>
      </p>
      <p> </p>
      <p>She stared at him in shock for a few moments, obviously caught off guard by his gesture.<br/>Then, she blushed and shook her head, giving him a disbelieving look and taking his hands on her own and away from her face, giving him a small smile. "You are just trying to calm me down."</p>
      <p>Well, if she was brushing it off, he was going along with her. So he smirked. "I am many things Princess, but a liar is not one of them."</p>
      <p>"Oh yeah?" She said, quirking an eyebrow.</p>
      <p>She was still holding his hands. "Try me."</p>
      <p>"Tell me something embarrassing about you." She challenged.</p>
      <p>Fortunately, he was ready. "When I was eight, I had this beautiful book of myths and gods, I was so proud of it. My mom read it to me since I couldn't even comprehend it. When we moved here, I talked to all my new friends about this wonderful book, and they asked me to bring it to them. That day when I came home, I went straight to pick the book up and I brought it proudly to my mom. I was about to tell her the news when toddler Octavia thought it would be funny to throw up all over it."</p>
      <p>"She didn't?!"</p>
      <p>"She did. I had to go to school the next day and tell all my friends what happened, and no one believed me, they thought I made it all up 'cause I didn't really own the book."</p>
      <p>"Poor baby!" Clarke mocked, squeezing his hands.</p>
      <p>He shook his head, remembering. "I-was-so-mad. O came up with the flu and I didn't speak to her for like, three days straight. Then I started to feel guilty, because in the end she was sick, it wasn't her fault. I was so ashamed about my behavior. In that moment I decided I would fuss over her for the rest of my life, giving her all the attentions she lacked for those three days."</p>
      <p>She smirked. "Passing from rebel king to mother-hen in the blink of an eye, I see."</p>
      <p>He smiled. "Well, you are not angry anymore, so I count that as a win." </p>
      <p>Clarke looked at him surprised.<br/>She then released his hands, and he mocked himself for letting a moment like that go to waste.</p>
      <p>But oh, he was wrong again, and he understood it when she took a step forward to circle him with her arms.</p>
      <p>"Thank you." She whispered.</p>
      <p>If kissing her shocked him, this gave him the same amount of surprise.</p>
      <p>It took him a moment to register the fact that she was hugging him, but when it did he wrapped his arms around her and hugged her back tightly.<br/>"Anytime."</p>
      <p>They stood like that, hugging, for a long time, both knowing that they couldn't ignore the elephant in the room but both trying to relish in the hug as long as possible.<br/>Then, she buried her head in his chest and mumbled "I am sorry."</p>
      <p>"What? No Clarke, I am. I shouldn't have kiss-"</p>
      <p>"No Bell, listen to me. I want this too. I like you a- a lot. You've been so patient with me, never asking for anything more and I appreciate it so much. But even like this... it's been so long I just, I need some more time."</p>
      <p>He gave her an amused look. "You done? Clarke, you don't have to explain yourself to me. I acted on instinct, I shouldn't have. I promise, the next time we kiss? It'll be because you'll choose it."</p>
      <p>She blushed, burying her head in his chest again. "I am not used to all this sweetness anymore."</p>
      <p>He laughed, and brought her eye to eye with him. "And Clarke? For the record," He kissed her cheek. "I like you a lot, too."</p>
      <p>She pushed him away, flushing bright red, but he caught her hand with his. "Stop it!"</p>
      <p>For good measure, he brought her back to him and kissed her nose. He couldn't help it. "Now princess, care to give me the grand tour?"</p>
    </div>
  </div>
  <div>
    <p> </p>
    <p> </p>
    <hr/>
    <p> </p>
    <p> </p>
  </div>
  <div>
    <p>Bellamy was preparing for bed that night, going around his room, and again, thinking about Clarke.</p>
    <p>That afternoon, he waited with her at the gallery until Lincoln and his sister came back. In the meantime, she showed him around the gallery. Bellamy listened greedily to everything Clarke told him, and he was surprised to see how much she valued his opinions on her works. As if there was a remote possibility that he wouldn't like them. Every piece was so meticulously done. Every time they stopped in front of a new painting, all it took was a look for Bellamy to understand and feel what emotion Clarke wanted to transmit while painting it.<br/>She was so damn talented. </p>
    <p> </p>
    <p>Before parting ways, they decided to all go out for drinks to tell each other about their day.</p>
    <p>His sister took up the scene, bragging about all the emerging artists they found at the fair and the couple of famous artists Lincoln introduced her to.<br/>She showed Clarke some pictures, seeking her approval, and he was so proud in seeing how Clarke praised her.</p>
    <p>Needless to say the atmosphere changed when Clarke brought up her meeting with Cage Wollace.<br/>Bellamy could see Lincoln was bothered for her behalf, probably thinking that if he stayed at the gallery nothing would have happened.<br/>And Clarke probably thought the same thing, because she reassured him, specifying that the meeting came up last minute and that anyone could have presumed what a creepy prick Wollace was.<br/>Lincoln thanked Bellamy for being there and promised to be with Clarke for all the future meetings with Wollace, and that was enough for Bellamy.<br/>He would have gone himself if Lincoln didn't.</p>
    <p> </p>
    <p> </p>
    <p>Settling in bed, he decided to call her.<br/>Just to make sure she was ok.</p>
    <p>After the third ring, she picked up. "Bellamy?"</p>
    <p>"Hey."</p>
    <p>"Everything all right?"</p>
    <p>"Yeah. I just called to ask you the same thing, actually. I wanted to make sure you were ok, you know, after what happened today."</p>
    <p>"Oh. Yes, I am fine. All in all, it was a good day."</p>
    <p>He sat up straight in bed. "It was?"</p>
    <p>Clarke laughed nervously. "Yeah. I mean, Cage did freak me out. But after that... You calmed me down and, I had fun with you today. We laughed a lot." A pause. "Didn't we?" She added, as an afterthought.</p>
    <p>"Damn right we did." He reassured her.</p>
    <p>She let out a breath.  "Well that's good to hear, because I was thinking about it earlier, and I was worried I bored you with all the talk about the gallery and the paintings but you seemed interested so probably-"</p>
    <p>"Clarke?"</p>
    <p>"Yeah?"</p>
    <p>"... I like it when you call me Bell." He said, effectively stopping her rambling.</p>
    <p>The line went still.</p>
    <p>"You, ah, you could do that. You know like, always." He said, flustered, pulling his hair.</p>
    <p>Still silence.</p>
    <p>"Can I ask you something?" He said, just to change the subject, passing his hand through his face and hitting the headboard with his head.</p>
    <p>"Sure."</p>
    <p>"Why are the walls of your study white? I always imagined them full of colors, or at least with some paintings hanging on them. A mural, maybe?"</p>
    <p>A soft laugh reached his ears. "You put some thought into it, haven't you? ... I did too, at the time. The first thing that I did with Lincoln when we bought the space, was to set up our studies. I wanted it to give me a sense of calm. The idea was to create a space where I can go and start drawing right away, and where every time I am in need of inspiration, I can look at the walls and ask myself what would I paint on them in that specific moment and just do it."</p>
    <p>"Like a white canvas."</p>
    <p>"Exactly! I lost count of how many times I painted all the walls only to bring them to white two days later."</p>
    <p>"You didn't."</p>
    <p>"I swear I did! Sometimes, when I didn't have canvas of the right width or when I had an idea that wasn't a hundred percent formed in my head, I just started bringing it out on the walls. Lincoln was so annoyed with me in the beginning, 'cause I always asked him for help to bring the walls back to white. Then, one night, I barged in my study 'cause I just had an idea and found Lincoln painting on my walls. From that moment on his walls have always been white too."</p>
    <p>"It's a shame to cover something you put so much energy into."</p>
    <p>She hummed. "Well the definitive versions of the paintings are exposed. In the walls we put the drafts, the thoughts. Anyway, we have an album of photos where we put everything that ever was on those walls."</p>
    <p>He considered her answer, while he listened to her taking deep breaths.<br/>Just as he was about to ask her if she was all right he heard a soft "... Bell?"</p>
    <p>Bellamy closed his eyes, smiling to himself. She just needed some time. "Yeah?"</p>
    <p>"Would you like to come to our next dinner night? Not- not just you, I think it's time for our groups to finally blend together, don't you think?"</p>
    <p>He hoped his big smile could reach her in that moment. "That would be amazing, princess."</p>
    <p>"Ok! I'll let you know as soon as we set up a date so you can check with your friends. You already met mine, the only one I'll have to introduce you to is Jackson."</p>
    <p>"All right. I'll have to check with Miller and Maya, maybe Emori...?" He thought to himself. "I am sure O and Murphy'll definitely be free."</p>
    <p>"Oh, I don't have any doubts. Murphy wouldn't want to pass on an occasion to see Raven. And to mock me, obviously."</p>
    <p>"To mock us, you wanted to say." He laughed.</p>
    <p>She giggled. "My bad. Anyway, call whomever you want. I already know Maya, she's sweet. Although I should warn you, Jasper has a big crush on her. I'll have to start preparing him mentally to pass an entire night with her."</p>
    <p>Bellamy half laughed and half groaned. "If I understood something about him, I would bet he'll be an overexcited, nervous child that'll make fun of himself in every possible way."</p>
    <p>Clarke belly laughed at that. "You can bet he'll be! He'll start freaking out as soon as I tell him. In fact... I could omit it to him at all."</p>
    <p>He smirked "Evil."</p>
    <p>"Hey. have you seen him?! This is not about being a bad friend, it's about survival!"</p>
    <p>"You don't have to justify yourself to me, I am with you." He chuckled.</p>
    <p>She yawned. "Good to know."</p>
    <p>"Go to bed Clarke, it's been a long day."</p>
    <p>"Yeah, I'll go. Thank you for today, Bellamy. For everything." She seemed almost... reluctant, about hanging up.</p>
    <p>"As I said, anytime."</p>
    <p>"... I like talking to you. You are easy to talk to."</p>
    <p>He smiled, soft. "I like talking to you, too."</p>
    <p>"All right. Goodnight, Bell."</p>
    <p>"Goodnight, Princess."</p>
  </div>
</div><div>
  <p> </p>
</div>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>And we are back!<br/>Happy new year everyone, and sorry it took me so long!</p><p>From now on, to avoid spoilers I'll start to add warnings at the end of each chapter in case of mature/triggering content.<br/>Things are going to get interesting, can't wait to hear what your impressions and ideas are!</p><p>Happy reading!</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was a week and a half later, and Clarke was oddly calm as she waited for Bellamy, Octavia and their friends to show up at The Dropship.<br/>
<br/>
They decided to order pizzas, so anyone should've bothered with cooking, and they could all enjoy the night.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
From her seat at the bar, she surveyed the situation from afar: Monty and Lincoln were trying to calm a freaked out Jasper who just now found out that Maya was on her way here; Harper and Raven were chatting idly a couple of feet away, probably sorting out a strategy to calm him down that didn't consist in black him out by a kick in the head.<br/>
<br/>
It wasn't her fault ok?<br/>
She wanted to tell him beforehand, her friends didn't. They voted.<br/>
She tried to persuade them, but they all were so sure Jasper wouldn't have let them live for days, they decided to tell him an hour before dinner.<br/>
Needless to say he nearly exploded. When Monty told him the news, Jasper literally fell off his chair, throwing a basket of chips on himself and everyone who so happened to be around him, hence, everyone.<br/>
<br/>
"Hey friend!" Said Jackson, sliding beside her and giving her a kiss on the cheek.<br/>
<br/>
"Jack, hey! How are you?"<br/>
<br/>
"Well, you are lucky I love you, otherwise I would be passed out on my bed right about now."<br/>
<br/>
"Lucky me!" She cheered, sticking her tongue out at him.<br/>
He smiled at her, helping himself with a beer.<br/>
<br/>
"So how was work?" She asked.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
There was a time when Clarke was in love with medicine.<br/>
<br/>
It was all planned out: ace high school with perfect grades, take the best extracurricular courses, Ivy League, residency in one of the best hospitals of the country, all to become a renowned surgeon, like her mother.<br/>
<br/>
And that was the problem.<br/>
She didn't want to be anything like her mother.<br/>
<br/>
For starters, outside school, she had a life. She wasn't a soldier.<br/>
Clarke wanted to cultivate other interests, like art, music.<br/>
For her mother, it was all a big distraction that would only make her lose her focus on the real target.<br/>
<br/>
And her mother?<br/>
Abigail Griffin was a woman whose time couldn't be wasted for futile things. Even if those <em>"futile things"</em> were her husband and daughter.<br/>
<br/>
Hence, her abandoning medicine, choosing instead to pursue art.<br/>
She'll never be grateful enough to her father for never letting Abby push enough to actually pursue in her crusade and preventing her from cultivating her passion for art.<br/>
Clarke only wished her father was there to see with his own eyes she didn't give up.<br/>
<br/>
That said, she always liked when Jackson told her stories about his residency and life of hospitals in general.<br/>
That could have been her life, after all.<br/>
And Jackson knew he could talk about whatever with her, 'cause thanks to her mother and her personal knowledge she could understand most of the things he said. And, most importantly, she wasn't disgusted about some of his stories like their friends were, rather hypnotized.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Her friend straightened in his seat and looked at her with a gleam in his eye.<br/>
"Work was busy, as usual. Rounds, visits, I met a guy and they let me lead an appendectomy today!"<br/>
<br/>
"No way! How was it? Was it difficult? You were brilliant I am sure!" She beamed at him.<br/>
<br/>
And then his words registered, and she silenced him as he was starting to answer. "Wait wait wait, you said you met a guy?!"<br/>
<br/>
He puffed out a laugh, nodding slightly. "Nathan. He has a construction company, came in because one of his was hit in the back pretty hard, wanted to make sure it was everything all right."<br/>
<br/>
"Kind of him. So, how's he? Did you guys talk?"<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Jackson opened his mouth to replay only to stop when his attention was stolen by something. Or rather someone.<br/>
Clarke followed his gaze where it landed on Octavia, Bellamy and all their friends that apparently just got there. One friend in particular, it seemed.<br/>
Yes, because her friend's gaze was fixated on a tall guy that was standing just beside Maya. Dark eyes, dark skin, all build up like only a person that constantly works out could be.<br/>
<br/>
She interrupted his staring contest snapping her fingers in front of him. "Earth to Jack? Hey?"<br/>
<br/>
Without moving his eyes from the guy he whispered "It's him Clarke."<br/>
<br/>
This was all a cosmic joke, wasn't it?!<br/>
How that was even possible?<br/>
<br/>
"Clarke, Clarke, Clarke," He said, gripping her shoulder and shaking her. "What am I going to do?"<br/>
<br/>
"Get to know him?"</p>
<p></p><div>
<p></p><div>
<p></p><div><p>"I don't know how to do it."<br/>
<br/>
"Of course you do. You did it today, didn't you?"<br/>
<br/>
But he kept shaking his head at her. "To-today I was in my element, but now? I don't even remember my own name. Clarke, look at him, he's so hot."<br/>
<br/>
She laughed at her friend's nervousness and gave his hand a reassuring squeeze, a plan already forming in her mind. "Breathe, Jacky. It's going to be fine, I am going to help, keep you grounded."<br/>
<br/>
He finally moved his gaze towards her, hopeful. "You won't let me make a fool of myself like Jasper?"<br/>
<br/>
"I promise."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
With that, she turned her head toward the entrance of the café and her gaze immediately locked with Bellamy's. She smiled, waving him over.<br/>
At that point, she was sure Nathan had already recognized Jackson and, even if some of their group scattered around the place, he followed Bellamy and Octavia and came standing before them.<br/>
<br/>
Clarke stood and flashed the group a big smile. "Hey guys, I am glad you all made it."<br/>
<br/>
She gave Bellamy a kiss on the cheek and Octavia a quick hug and then proceeded to introduce them to Jackson, before focusing her attention on their third guest.<br/>
"You must be Nathan! I am Clarke." She said, offering her hand at him.<br/>
<br/>
Clarke vaguely heard a "You know Miller?" from Bellamy's general direction, but she was intent on watching the glint in Nathan's eye from when he caught on the situation.<br/>
<br/>
He shook her hand in his and gave her a once over. "Oh believe me, I know who you are, blondie. You can call me Miller."<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy elbowed him in the side.<br/>
<br/>
She smirked. "Your employee ok?"<br/>
<br/>
"Yeah, just needs to rest for a couple of days. He had a good doctor." He said, winking at her.<br/>
<br/>
Clarke motioned to her seat. "Good. I'll leave you to his capable hands then."<br/>
<br/>
Miller took her seat, pointing behind them and towards a really confused Bellamy. "And I'll leave you to his not so capable hands, I am afraid."<br/>
<br/>
She giggled. "Nice to meet you Miller, you break his heart, I break your legs."<br/>
<br/>
"Same to you, blondie. Same to you."<br/>
They high-fived, laughing hard.<br/>
<br/>
"Why are they being so weird?" Octavia asked her brother.<br/>
<br/>
But Bellamy looked around him, dubious. "What did just happen?"<br/>
<br/>
Jackson shook his head and laughed, embarrassed. "Your girlfriend just made me seem like a fool in front of the guy I like."<br/>
<br/>
She didn't have the time to reply to that, because Miller snapped his gaze to Jackson, smirking. "You like me?"<br/>
<br/>
Her friend blushed but in a burst of courage nodded, and they all busted out laughing this time, Clarke mouthing silently at Bellamy an <em>"I'll tell you later"</em>.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Their little moment came to an end when Raven came out of nowhere and placed herself in front of Octavia, arms crossed, eyebrow quirked, gaze assessing.<br/>
<br/>
Octavia, obviously unaffected, mimicked her stance and pursed her lips. "The best friend?"<br/>
<br/>
Raven, unbothered by her comment, replied Octavia arching her eyebrow even more, if that was even possible. "The sister-in-law?"<br/>
And that settled it.<br/>
<br/>
"GIRLS!" Clarke cut in, dumbstruck, and the duo smirked at each other and erupted laughing, friendship already formed.<br/>
They pulled Clarke on a booth with them and started talking like they knew each other for years.<br/>
<br/>
"Told ya." She heard Lincoln say to Bellamy, elbowing him repeatedly.<br/>
<br/>
Exasperated, she looked around, searching for someone to save her, only to find Bellamy smiling at her, amused. She stuck her tongue out at him and laughed.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Emori approached her as she was setting the table for dinner, two beers in hand.</p></div><div><p>"Clarke?"</p></div><div><p>"Emori, hey. It's good to see you."</p></div><div><p>"Can you give me a minute?"</p></div><div><p>She nodded and passed the plates to a suddenly nervous Murphy, giving him a reassuring smile. "Be right back!"<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Emori took her to a booth near the pool table, giving them a bit of privacy.<br/>
"I'm sorry for the ambush." She said, handing her a beer.</p></div><div><p>Clarke took it, smiling. "No problem. I figured it was coming."</p></div><div><p>"I'll be quick, I promise. If I am honest, I already had in mind to give you a call one of this day's. When Bellamy told me about the dinner I figured that would be an occasion like any other."<br/>
<br/>
Clarke nodded.<br/>
<br/>
"Well, I just wanted to say, that I understand, now. John never told me in depth what were your convictions, but we were together, and I was with him no matter what, you know? It's only when we moved here that I started thinking about it. Our relationship gave us comfort, but it had no future prospects. Every day was the same. It was all about knowing to have a person to come home to, but other than that?"</p></div><div><p>She sipped her beer for a moment. Clarke wondered if it was her turn to talk, but in the end decided to give Emori some more time to elaborate her thoughts.</p></div><div><p>"And then one day Anya came to me asking for a tattoo. And again the next week. And the week after that. Suddenly I had something to look forward to. And it all clicked. The night I confronted him about it, it was clear John knew it too. I never thought that breaking up with someone could be so easy and so hard at the same time. But we knew it was the right thing to do. We loved each other deeply, but we weren't meant to be. And we were surprisingly good at admitting that to each other."</p></div><div><p>She let out a long breath and gave Clarke a small smile. "All that to say, sorry if I was a bitch to you, at times. I know you were trying to protect John, and maybe even me, in a way. In the end we figured it out for ourselves."</p></div><div><p>"I backed up exactly for that reason. I figured you guys had to sort your things out on your own. I never objected to the fact that you two didn't love each other, that I hope was clear. I just - when I was with you, I could see you were comfortable with each other, but not happy. Like having the other was a habit. A relationship should be a constant discovery of the other. At one point it was as if you were satisfied with what you had, you know? It shouldn't be like that."</p></div><div><p>"I know it now."<br/>
<br/>
"And you don't have to apologize to me, Emori. Believe me, I know it's hard when someone analyzes your relationship on the microscope. I didn't want to intrude, I just wanted my friend to be happy. I am glad you two found a way to understand it. And I am happy you didn't let go of the other. I always liked you Emori. You are determined, and you did never put up with Murphy's shit. I always appreciated that."</p></div><div><p>Emori laughed, bumping her bottle with Clarke's. "I'll drink to that."</p></div><div><p>They both took a pull from their beers, and then Emori looked past Clarke and gave her a devilish smirk. "Speaking about John..."</p></div><div><p>Clarke smirked right back. "He's losing his mind, isn't he?"</p></div><div><p>She nodded. "He's pretending to be on the phone just to come our way and try to overhear something!"</p></div><div><p>"He's probably worried about us fighting each other, not thinking that we are two mature adults capable of having a conversation without killing each other!" Clarke shot over her shoulder.<br/>
<br/>
Emori backed her up. "Oh stop it, John! We are just chatting!" </p></div><div><p>At that he huffed, reached them and pulled a chair to sit beside Clarke throwing his phone on the table, then stealing her beer and taking a long pull. "Thank god. I was afraid you were going to rip each other's heads off."<br/>
<br/>
She leveled him with a look, taking her beer back. "We are not children, you know?"<br/>
<br/>
"Just wanted to make sure."<br/>
<br/>
"Well, you could've just kept flirting with Raven, we were fine here."<br/>
<br/>
"Yeah John, you totally should bang Raven."<br/>
<br/>
Clarke did the best to stifle her laugh, and watched as Murphy gave them an unimpressed glare.<br/>
"Wow. My ex-girlfriend and my best friend imploring me to bang someone. I can't believe I am at that point."<br/>
<br/>
"I wasn't that explicit!!" She said laughing.<br/>
<br/>
"Oh, you were. Exactly zero point five seconds after Raven arrived at your place a few weeks ago, if I recall it correctly." He deadpanned.<br/>
<br/>
"Touché."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
The night went on more or less like that: eating, drinking, getting to know each other, laughing, Jasper making a fool of himself.<br/>
<br/>
Clarke and Bellamy didn't spend the entire night together, and it was ok with them. After all, the goal was to get to know other people and create a new big family.<br/>
And that she did.<br/>
<br/>
She couldn't believe how the two groups fitted so well together.<br/>
<br/>
Clarke had a pleasant chat with sweet Maya, catching up with her and hearing all about her new job as social assistant, since the last time she saw the girl was a couple of months prior.<br/>
And even if Jasper took every chance he got to interrupt them and/or give them his opinion on the argument at hand, Maya was always ready to hear him out and laugh at his stupid jokes. It would take a while, but she could see even in his clumsiness, Jasper piked Maya's interest.<br/>
<br/>
She had the time to get to know Anya, discovering she worked at the local gym as a judo and kick boxing instructor which, have you seen her? Totally believable.<br/>
Anya also enraptured all the girls when she told them that once a week she taught a class of self-defense, so much so that they all decided to start taking her class as a group.<br/>
<br/>
Miller and Jackson took the scene for a bit, because everyone was curious to know why the two knew each other. From then on they all made a point to tease them every chance they got, Clarke included.<br/>
What? She was always the main victim of her friends teasing, she had to jump on these occasions when possible!<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
She was washing some glasses catching up with Harper, Bellamy and Emori a few booths down, when a very apologetic Lincoln approached them.<br/>
<br/>
"Eh, sorry guys, but I think that one is ready for bed." He said, pointing at Octavia.<br/>
<br/>
And Clarke could see why. She was sprawled out on a table, sleeping soundly.<br/>
"Yeah, don't ask questions, she said she was comfy." Lincoln continued, shaking his head, amused.<br/>
<br/>
They all laughed.<br/>
"All right," Started Bellamy, standing up from his booth, "I'll go gather Murphy, he's our ride home."<br/>
<br/>
Clarke looked over to where Murphy was deep in a drinking game with Monty, Jasper and Anya, all their other friends that were cheering them on, laughing hard, and made a split decision.<br/>
She turned off the sink and, shooting a side glance at Harper that gave her an approving and encouraging look she said "Bell, I'll bring you home, don't bother Murphy."<br/>
<br/>
He looked at her, surprised. "Are you sure?"</p></div><div>
<p></p><div><p>Clarke nodded. "I wasn't going to stay much longer anyway, I have an early appointment tomorrow."</p></div><div><p>"That we do." Interjected Lincoln, and they both cringed thinking about Diana Sidney and the infinite morning that'll await them, talking about pieces, lengths, spaces and timing. She was lucky the project was interesting, 'cause it was the only reason they resisted and played along with Sidney's antic. She was a bitch. And a friend of her mother, obviously. </p></div><div><p>She patted her friend in the back, passing him. "I am going to meditate when I get home."</p></div><div><p>He chuckled. "Good luck. I'll text tomorrow morning when I'm about to leave home, ok?"</p></div><div><p>"Yep, thanks Linc. Bye ladies!" She said to Harper and Emori.</p></div><div><p>Clarke then addressed Bellamy. "Go take your sister, I'll tell the others we are living."</p></div><div><p>He smiled at her. "Thanks, princess."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
She reached the table just as Murphy and Anya finished downing a few shots of various colors in what seemed like a race.<br/>
"Hey, the real fun is here!" She said, laughing.<br/>
<br/>
Her friends cheered at her, lifting their glasses in acknowledgment and taking a sip.<br/>
She stopped beside Raven, side hugging her and addressing her friends just as Bellamy reached them transporting a barely conscious Octavia. "Guys, Octavia here is pretty swamped, I am going to give her and Bellamy a ride home."<br/>
<br/>
They all started protesting jokingly.<br/>
"Clarke, wait, I'll go." Jumped in Murphy.<br/>
<br/>
She smiled playfully at him. "Don't worry Murph, stay here, be social... for once in your life."<br/>
<br/>
"Yes Murphy, stay here with us! If Bellamy is going, you need to be here to help me flirt with Maya!" Whisper-shouted Jasper.<br/>
<br/>
Everyone laughed, Maya turning a bright shade of red, but Murphy shook his head adamantly, not sparing him a glance. "It's my house Griffin, I am taking them."<br/>
<br/>
Clarke arched an eyebrow at him. "Murphy, I have an early rise tomorrow, on the contrary, it's your day off. What's the problem?"<br/>
<br/>
She didn't let him the time to reply, continuing "Besides, you just downed your third consecutive shot."<br/>
<br/>
She saw Murphy clench his fists on the table, but he really couldn't reply to that.<br/>
Clarke gave him a questioning look, which he avoided.<br/>
Turning to Bellamy, she saw him doing the same, confused.<br/>
<br/>
At that point, everyone was pretty weirded out by what was happening.<br/>
"What's the problem, Murphy?" Raven said, cocking a perfect eyebrow at him.<br/>
<br/>
"Yeah, let mom and dad go, so the real party can start!" Cut in Jasper.<br/>
<br/>
Murphy downed another shot, and finally lifted his eyes to look at Clarke.<br/>
"There is no problem. You guys go ahead. This was my last drink, I'll come home in an hour or so." He said, tight.<br/>
<br/>
She mouthed an <em>"I'll call you tomorrow"</em> at him and Clarke could see he was holding back something when he nodded at her, eyes filled with worry.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
"Well, we are going then." She said, nodding at Bellamy.<br/>
<br/>
They started heading towards the exit when she suddenly remembered something. "Jasper?" She said, whipping around to shoot him a death glare.<br/>
<br/>
He perked up, staring at her. "That mom and dad thing? Never again."<br/>
<br/>
"YES MOM! Oh, fuck -"<br/>
<br/>
Everyone started laughing, even Bellamy, and she shook her head, defeated.<br/>
<br/>
Well, at least the mood improved since Murphy's exit.<br/>
She really couldn't manage to understand him.</p></div></div><div>
<p></p><div><p> </p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p> </p><p>Bellamy was silent the whole ride home.<br/>
She didn't even try to broach a subject to chat, she just knew he would have cut her off.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
As soon as they reached her friends apartment building, he jumped off the car and started for the door, only to stop midway to turn to her, probably remembering his sister was in the back of the car.<br/>
<br/>
Clarke shot him a strange look, but waved him off.<br/>
"Go on, open the door, I've got her." She told him, trying to extricate a barely conscious Octavia out of the car.<br/>
<br/>
He nodded, not looking her in the eye, and jogged to the door of the building.<br/>
<br/>
She opted on silencing momentarily her doubts, focusing instead on the task at hand.<br/>
"Ok Octavia, help me a little here." She muttered, sneaking an arm around her shoulders.<br/>
<br/>
She didn't.<br/>
<br/>
But Clarke sure wasn't one to give up and ask for help.<br/>
Yes, she was small, but Octavia was even smaller than her, and thinner.<br/>
She could do this, ok?<br/>
<br/>
She didn't know what was the image Bellamy saw when he turned around after opening the door.<br/>
But it probably was a fun one, because he clearly tried all he could to not let out a laugh, even in his bad mood.<br/>
<br/>
All Clarke knew was that in order to be able to take Octavia inside, she practically threw her on her shoulder, transporting her like a potato sack.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
He watched her for a moment, only to snap out of it when Clarke wobbled a little, thanks to a little hole in the ground.<br/>
"Clarke, what are you, let me help!"<br/>
<br/>
She shook her head, walking past him.<br/>
"There are three rounds of stairs." He pointed out.<br/>
<br/>
"I can do it."<br/>
<br/>
He stepped in front of her. "Oh I don't doubt it, princess. But she's my sister. My responsibility."<br/>
<br/>
Clarke was rather adamant on completing her task, but there was something on Bellamy's voice that told her to let it go.<br/>
So she let him take Octavia from her and followed him in silence inside the building, up the stairs and as he waved his way through the apartment to what she assumed was his sister's room, carrying her bridal style.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
"Bed!" Octavia shouted as soon as his brother entered the room, making them both jump.</p></div></div><div><p>"The fuck, O?!" Bellamy scolded.<br/>
<br/>
Octavia ignored him, and as Bellamy put her on the ground she wasted no time and threw herself on the bed, going under the covers without bothering to take her shoes off.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Within seconds, she was out cold, even snoring softly.<br/>
Bellamy grumbled something under his breath and went to do just that.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Amused, Clarke stood at the door watching with fondness how Bellamy was taking care of his little sister, taking off her shoes and socks, tucking her under the covers, then going to the bathroom to fill a glass with water and placing it on her nightstand with an Advil for the "morning after".<br/>
Lastly, he took the trashcan and placed it beside her on the floor, just in case.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Clarke watched as Bellamy sat at the end of the bed, sighing.<br/>
She frowned. "Everything ok?"<br/>
<br/>
He nodded, not looking at her. She entered the room and went straight in front of him, invading his space to stand between his legs.<br/>
"Hey." She whispered softly, placing a hand on his face, carding his cheek. He leaned into it, finally looking up at her.<br/>
<br/>
"Sorry."<br/>
<br/>
Clarke gave him a questioning look.<br/>
"It's stupid really. I just - Murphy's behavior earlier unsettled me a little."<br/>
<br/>
She nodded, understanding.<br/>
He continued. "He always seemed ok with how things were going between us, I really don't understand why he was so adamant on not letting you come here with me and O."<br/>
<br/>
At that he hugged her, bringing her closer to him and burying his head in her stomach.<br/>
"He's my best friend, you know? Yours too. It would be hard if he wasn't ok with this. 'Cause I really like you, and I don't want to have to give up on neither of you."<br/>
<br/>
"You won't." She spoke gently, caressing his hair. They were so soft.<br/>
<br/>
"How are you so sure about that?" He mumbled.<br/>
<br/>
"Because Murphy may be a dick, but he loves us. And if we are happy, he's going to be, too."<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy hummed.<br/>
<br/>
Clarke sensed him shiver as she scratched at the back of his neck, exhaling softly. "And because I like you too, grumpy."<br/>
<br/>
His grip on her tightened, and he nuzzled her stomach, pressing a soft kiss there.<br/>
<br/>
They stayed like that, basking in the warmth of the other, since Octavia started moving around on the bed, effectively reminding them of her presence.<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy's hold loosened as he finally lifted his head to look up at her, giving her a soft look.<br/>
Clarke passed her hand through his hair once more, and bent down to kiss him on the forehead.<br/>
<br/>
She took his hand to help pull him up and off the bed.<br/>
They started for the door, both glancing one last time at Octavia to make sure she was really asleep and she didn't assist on their cheesy exchange, when Clarke's gaze was caught to a paper just under her nightstand.<br/>
<br/>
She pulled on Bellamy's hand. "Hey, there's something there, I am just going to pick it up."<br/>
<br/>
As she crouched down, she realized that it was a photo laying on the ground, and not a paper.<br/>
Standing up, she aligned it towards the light that came in from the corridor to take a better look.<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy came up behind her, immediately tensing once he saw what was in her hands. She gave him a questioning look, to which he only smiled tightly in response.<br/>
<br/>
Clarke's attention turned back to the photo- in it, she could see a younger Bellamy giving a piggyback ride to a toddler Octavia, both wearing bright smiles for the camera.<br/>
Just beside them, another figure was visible in the photo, hands on her knees, eyes bulging out of her head and an evident big laugh going on.<br/>
She froze.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
A long minute passed, Clarke unable to move.<br/>
She was trying to convince herself not to fly out of the house, when she heard Bellamy swallow audibly. "That's our mother."<br/>
<br/>
Clarke gathered all the strength that was left in her to give him a nod in reply, eyes still glued to the woman in the photo.<br/>
"I don't even know why this photo is here, we don't like to have them around." He muttered.<br/>
<br/>
"She is beautiful." She croaked, hoping not to sound as broken as she felt.<br/>
<br/>
Bellamy let out a breath. "She's dead."<br/>
<br/>
Her eyes snapped to his at that, only he wasn't looking at her.<br/>
He took the photo from her hands and stared at it for a moment.<br/>
<br/>
It was the look in his eyes that brought Clarke back to reality.<br/>
She could see it all, in his face. The shame, the anger, the sorrow. She had to get them out of this moment, for both of their sake.<br/>
<br/>
So she squeezed his arm tight enough for him to lift his eyes to her. "Walk me to the door?"<br/>
<br/>
He shook his head and nodded, shoving the photo in one of Octavia's drawers and heading straight out of the room.<br/>
Bellamy didn't stop since he reached the kitchen and gulped down a glass full of water, breathing heavily.<br/>
<br/>
Everything inside of Clarke was screaming at her to run and never turn back.<br/>
But her heart? It was begging her to stay, to make sure Bellamy was ok.<br/>
Unsure, she decided to listen to it.<br/>
"Bellamy?" She said, reminding him of her presence.<br/>
<br/>
"I am sorry." He said, voice rough, not looking at her.<br/>
<br/>
She shook her head. "Don't be."<br/>
<br/>
He continued. "I don't talk about her often, and I certainly don't like it when I have to."<br/>
<br/>
Compassion radiated through her, perfectly understanding the reasons of his behavior.<br/>
Again, she came up to him, only this time placing a hand on his chest. "You don't have to justify yourself to me, Bell."<br/>
<br/>
"I want to be able to talk about it, above all with you. It's just- hard." He said anguished, hand coming up to rest over hers on his chest.<br/>
<br/>
Eyes glued to their hands, voice trembling, she replied "We all have some parts of our past that are hard to reminisce."<br/>
<br/>
She could sense the exact moment understanding washed over him. She took a step away from him. "Whenever you're ready."<br/>
<br/>
He nodded. "Same to you."<br/>
<br/>
She turned to leave, only a moment later she felt Bellamy taking her hand and turning her towards him once again.<br/>
<br/>
"Thanks, princess." He murmured, kissing her on the forehead.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
And looking at him in that moment, it all clicked.<br/>
She could perfectly see all the traits that connected him with his mother: the wild hair, the brown eyes, the crooked smile, the strong jawline.<br/>
<br/>
Clarke needed to get out of there.<br/>
She could feel the beginning of a panic attack approach from deep inside her. She just hoped to be able to reach her car before breaking down.<br/>
<br/>
Clarke didn't have any doubt only one look at her face was all Bellamy needed to understand there was something terribly wrong going on.<br/>
<br/>
For that reason, she let go of his hand and stepped away from him, heading straight for the door.<br/>
He was hot on her heels, probably sensing her change in demeanor.<br/>
<br/>
"Clarke?" He said, a slight frown in his voice.<br/>
<br/>
She couldn't look at him.<br/>
Clarke sensed he was about to prompt more out of her, but fortunately for her, Octavia choose that exact moment to wake up and call drunkenly for her brother.<br/>
<br/>
She didn't waste any more time. It was only when she had a foot already out the door that Clarke turned one last time and directed the shakiest of replies at his feet instead of his beautiful warm eyes.<br/>
"Go to her. She needs you. Goodnight, Bellamy."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
She waited to hear the door shutting definitely behind her and started running down the stairs.<br/>
<br/>
Clarke was shaking, and she could feel her cheeks were already dump from the tears that were blurring her vision. Her ears were ringing. She needed to get to her car. Clarke started to descend the steps two at a time, not even stopping when she slipped and fell knees hard on the floor, mind going a mile a minute, not shutting down even with the pain that shot through her knees and the coolness of the marble staircase.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
There wasn't a lot of light in Octavia's room, but the person in the photo staring back at her was unmistakable.<br/>
<br/>
That face was one Clarke couldn't forget.<br/>
<br/>
Because even after years, Clarke's worst nightmares were haunted by Aurora Blake.</p></div></div></div>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Warnings: mentions of character death and panic attacks.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Read the note at the end for warnings.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>As soon as she exited the building, Clarke collapsed on the ground, gasping.<br/>
<br/>
Her head was pounding, her eyes burned, her heart was jumping uncontrollably in her chest, she could feel it up in her throat.<br/>
She was shaking all over, her vision was so blurry she couldn't make out her surroundings anymore. On their own accords, her hands started scraping the solid ground underneath her, in search of something to keep her grounded. It was useless.<br/>
<br/>
<em>Reach your car, Clarke, dammit.<br/>
<br/>
</em>But every time she tried to find the strength to stand up, her legs started shaking, and she felt like the ground was disappearing under her feet.<br/>
Clarke started feeling lightheaded. Air. She needed air. Why couldn't she take a normal breath?!<br/>
She didn't know how long she stayed there.<br/>
<br/>
It could have been minutes, could have been hours, the only thing she knew was that at a certain point she registered a car approaching and someone rapidly rushing towards her.<br/>
<br/>
When a pair of arms encircled her, Clarke didn't run away.<br/>
And not just because in her state she couldn't, but because she knew who they belonged immediately.<br/>
<br/>
"Fuck, Clarke. Clarke? Hey, It's me. Don't freak out."<br/>
<br/>
And then, "Seriously Murphy? She's already freaking out."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
And she would've laughed at her friend's clumsiness, if she wasn't so out of it.<br/>
His arms tightened around her, and suddenly Murphy's voice was in her ear. "I'm here, Clarke."<br/>
<br/>
She wheezed, searching for air that wasn't there. "I can't, I c-can't-"<br/>
<br/>
He let go of her body to instead crouch in front of her, gripping her shoulders in his hands hard, making her look at him. "Hey, none of that. We can do this Griffin, you hear me? Focus on my voice."<br/>
<br/>
And she tried, she did. But the air just wasn't there. She shook her head frantically.<br/>
<br/>
"Come on Clarke, breathe with me. You can do this, ok?"<br/>
<br/>
She felt him beside her, starting to breathe deeply. "In, out."<br/>
<br/>
Murphy then moved them to the point where he was stretched on the ground with her completely on top of him, her back to his front.<br/>
He kept breathing deeply, and she felt it everywhere in her body.<br/>
"In," His chest swelled beneath her, keeping the air in for a few seconds, then blowing it out, ruffling her hair with the force of it. "Out."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
"In... out..."<br/>
<br/>
He started to rock her gently, and she didn't know when or how, but the fog started clearing and the air started flowing. "That's good Clarke, you are almost there. Look up."<br/>
<br/>
And why don't give it a shot. With all the strength she could muster, she focused on the black sky above her, allowing her friend to calm her down. "Let's see. Tonight's sky cinema offers... an old lady dancing a polka, to your left, and a group of frogs watching her, beating their heads and frogging to the rhythm. Oh, and just above them, that is definitely Aladdin on top of his rug watching the scene..."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Clarke didn't remember the drive home.<br/>
<br/>
One moment, Murphy was guiding her to her car, the next she was hugging tightly her toilet, letting out the contents of her stomach throughout her tears, her friend holding back her hair and trying again to calm her down. "Gross, Griffin. Gross. Thank god you didn't drink much. Let it all out."<br/>
<br/>
Her vision was still blurry. Her mouth tasted bad.<br/>
When all that came out of her mouth were bile and more gasps, she let go of the toilet, collapsing and leaning her forehead against the cold tiles of her bathroom floor, closing her eyes.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
When she came to, she found herself curled up on her couch, cheeks dump, clutching a blanket tightly to her chest, trembling.<br/>
<br/>
Murphy entered the living room and crouched down in front of her, placing a mug on the beside table. He then took her hands in his and started cleaning them with a wet cloth. "You should drink something." He said, tough he knew it was useless. <br/>
<br/>
It wasn't his first rodeo after all.<br/>
<br/>
She shook her head, borrowing further in the blanket.<br/>
<br/>
"At least rinse your mouth with some mouthwash, will you?"<br/>
<br/>
Begrudgingly, she took the small cup he handed her and washed the grossness off her mouth.<br/>
<br/>
Murphy observed her for a few seconds, and then nodded to himself. "I'll take the armchair. Call if you need something. Or grunt. Or scream. I'll take anything."<br/>
<br/>
She looked at him, blinking a few times.<br/>
He gave her an affronted look. "Oh, don't start. I'm not leaving, Miss, so don't even try. Pff, what do you think? Gotta be there for you. And don't insist!"<br/>
<br/>
At her friend's rant, a feeble, almost imperceptible smile appeared on her lips.<br/>
<br/>
Murphy saw it, and grinned at her. "There it is. Welcome back, Griffin."<br/>
<br/>
He squeezed her hands before letting go. "Try to sleep, ok? I'll be right here with you." <br/>
<br/>
Clarke caught his hand as he stood up, squeezing it with all the strength she could muster in her weak state.<br/>
Murphy nodded at her, squeezing back. "Every step of the way."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
</p><hr/>
<p><br/>
<br/>
When she woke up next, the first thing Clarke noticed was that it was hard blinking her eyes open. <br/>
She was sweating, probably thanks to the twisted blanket around her. Her hands hurt.<br/>
<br/>
Faint rays of sunlight illuminated her living room, it must have been early morning.<br/>
Wait, why was she sleeping on her couch instead of her beautiful, comfy bed?<br/>
<br/>
It took her rubbing her eyes and watching her hands coming back black with mascara, on top of her fingers red and swollen to remember.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
A broken sob escaped from her lips, and it was all it took for Murphy to stroll in and immediately crouch in front of her. "You awake. And no sign of nightmares, for now."<br/>
<br/>
Yeah, she had noticed too, but probably she was too exhausted even to dream when she fell asleep.<br/>
<br/>
He sat cross-legged beside her and let her cry for a while.<br/>
<br/>
After some indefinite time, he straightened up, cleared his throat and started the <em>"let's put Clarke back together routine"</em>.<br/>
<br/>
"So, first things first, I called Lincoln and told him you came up with a stomach bug, and you can't go with him to Miss Bitch Sidney today, and you'll probably take a few days off. He said don't worry and to take care, he'll hold the fort while you're gone. Same for Jaha, he told me Lincoln already called him to cover for you, yeah I took care about that too. I slept on that comfy but still crappy armchair tonight, so I am holding it against you for the next three years or so obviously. Don't ask about my beanbag, didn't feel it. I also ordered some groceries to be delivered, because of course you have barely a frozen macaroni and cheese in your fridge. Unbelievable. Your best friend is a cook, and you can't even fill your kitchen with real food. Tough I don't know why I am still surprised. You are going to feed your children takeout from day one I don't doubt that. Poor creatures."<br/>
<br/>
"Anyway, I must say, yesterday was a success. I have to admit I kinda missed the old gang, even those two crazy weirdos. When Emori came to you, I almost had a heart attack. I really, really restricted myself from going with you or interrupting almost immediately, you should be proud of me, just saying. And have you seen Maya with Jasper?! How is it possible that skunk captured her attention, there must be some sorcerers involved. Also, I forgot to tell you, the other day at work..."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
It went on like that for hours.<br/>
He talked, she cried, and he talked some more.<br/>
<br/>
Only when she stopped crying and started taking in deep breaths he effectively stopped.<br/>
<br/>
The sun was high in the sky by then.<br/>
<br/>
Her muscles ached for being in the same position for too long, but she honestly didn't care. She didn't have the strength to move even a finger.<br/>
<br/>
Speaking of, at a certain point Murphy came up to her with her medical kit and tended her little wounds, bandaging her fingers where necessary. He shot her a disapproving look, and she felt it deep in her insides.<br/>
<br/>
She didn't want to be like this. But it was inevitable. It was a coping mechanism that was instilled so deep in her bones, she didn't even realize she was doing it anymore.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
As predicted, the nightmares came.<br/>
Every time exhaustion overtook her and she succumbed to what would be a few hours of restless sleep, what welcomed her were the things that Clarke feared the worst: darkness, metal, shadows and screams, all blurred together. Clarke found herself more than once starting awake in Murphy's arms, screaming, trembling, struggling for breath, calling for them.<br/>
<br/>
Unable to stop herself, she started searching all the scars that littered her body, the incommutable proof that what happened was real and not just inside her head.<br/>
Pain was ok. She knew pain. She could deal with pain.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Around her probably the world was going on, but she didn't feel it. She didn't live it.<br/>
Her friends were without doubt starting to worry, not hearing from her.<br/>
Murphy would have to take care of it, but not her. She just couldn't.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
The only thing she was aware beside her pain was the sun rising, setting, and rising again outside her window.<br/>
<br/>
Murphy was opening her curtains when Clarke, voice hoarse, throat hurt from her crying, said "You knew."<br/>
<br/>
And it wasn't a question.<br/>
<br/>
In her unfocused state, it was the only thing that was certain.<br/>
<br/>
And going back to Murphy's stubbornness earlier at the café, she should've known that something was wrong.<br/>
He didn't want her to give Octavia and Bellamy a ride home because he didn't want for her to find out about it. And he probably made up an excuse to be able to come back so soon. All that because he knew what would be awaiting him at his arrival.<br/>
<br/>
"I did." He replied, firm, his expression grime.<br/>
<br/>
He didn't dwell on explanations. It was a conversation for another moment. Clarke wasn't in the conditions to comprehend them anyway.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
She spent the day shrinking into herself.<br/>
<br/>
</p>
<p>The clock on her living room wall signed almost six when Clarke heard a firm knock on her door.<br/>
She didn't have the energy to panic. She trusted Murphy would handle it.<br/>
<br/>
Clarke heard voices and some shuffling, then silence.<br/>
She closed her eyes again.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
A few seconds later tough, she felt two pair of steps approaching. She tensed.<br/>
<br/>
"Sorry Griffin, but I really couldn't keep him away." Murphy said, but he didn't sound really apologetic.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
When she opened her eyes following Murphy's voice, she found her friend on the reclined to her right, although her eye quickly jumped to the figure standing in front of her.<br/>
Clarke furrowed her brows. "Thelonious?"<br/>
<br/>
"Hello, sweetheart."<br/>
<br/>
She opened her mouth to ask what he was doing in her living room, but he didn't give her the time to speak. "Think you could've fooled me, didn't you?"<br/>
<br/>
He shook his head. "You sometimes forget, that I know you since the moment you were born. And Clarke Griffin, ill, in full May, with this weather? Not even when you were a toddler I'm afraid, darling."<br/>
<br/>
Murphy snickered.<br/>
Jaha ignored him. "That, on top of the fact that you don't skip an art lesson since never, not even for work... not hard to put two and two together."<br/>
<br/>
Tapping on her legs, he gently shoved them away to sit on the couch beside her. He then brought his hands together in his lap and gave her a serious look. "I suppose you finally found out about Mr Bellamy Blake."<br/>
<br/>
She and Murphy both jumped at that. "What the hell? You knew?" Her friend busted out.<br/>
<br/>
"Of course I knew, Mr Murphy. I take my job very seriously. Before recruiting a new teacher I have to be sure about his references, and about his past as well as his future intentions."<br/>
<br/>
"Well, welcome to the <em>"Keep Clarke in the dark club"</em> then." Murphy stated grimly, giving life to her thoughts.<br/>
<br/>
They then proceeded to look at her, probably expecting a reaction.<br/>
She wouldn't give them one. "I am not mad at you."<br/>
<br/>
Jaha took one of her hands in his and, after inspecting the bandages and giving Murphy a thankful look, squeezed it. "It's ok if you are. Anyway, I came because I wanted to see with my eyes how are you doing, and because I want to say a few things. He doesn't know who I am, or that I know what happened, we haven't talked about it at his interview obviously. But when I called his old Principal in Polis for references, he told me Bellamy had to take some time off after his mother's death, that it wasn't a... conventional situation. That made me suspicious. So I made my research, and it didn't take me long to find out the truth."<br/>
<br/>
He looked at her with a serious expression. "There's no need for me to tell you he is a brilliant young man. Cares deeply about his work and his students. I would've been a fool not to offer him a position at the school for something someone else did and that gave him trouble too."<br/>
<br/>
Clarke nodded, fumbling with the blanket. "I know. That doesn't mean it's easy."<br/>
<br/>
Jaha nodded grimly. "It isn't. But it's not his fault."<br/>
<br/>
"I know." She replied somberly.<br/>
<br/>
"And it's not yours either."<br/>
<br/>
She averted her gaze from him at that, unable to respond.<br/>
<br/>
Murphy snorted. "Yeah, good luck with that one."<br/>
<br/>
Jaha shot him a glare and refocused quickly his attention on her. "Clarke? It's not your fault either."<br/>
<br/>
"Think it's gonna be some more time before I'll be able to accept that. If I'll be able to at all." She concluded, talking almost to herself.<br/>
<br/>
Murphy jumped up from the couch, ready to argue with her for the hundredth time, but Jaha held a hand up and cut him off. "There's nothing to accept, Clarke. Hating yourself for something that was totally out of your control is stupid."<br/>
<br/>
"Thank you!" Busted out Murphy, shooting his arms in the air.<br/>
<br/>
Clarke averted her gaze. "I can't do this right now."<br/>
<br/>
And that was enough to end the conversation.<br/>
Jaha pursed his lips and nodded to himself, debating if saying more she was sure. "Take all the time you need. School year is ending anyway."<br/>
<br/>
She gave him a terse look. "I am not going to abandon my students."<br/>
<br/>
Jaha gave her a warm smile, he was provoking her she could see it now. "That's good to hear." <br/>
<br/>
"Don't be a stranger, Clarke." He said, standing.<br/>
<br/>
She nodded.<br/>
He kissed her forehead and gave her a stern look. "Don't make me barge in again because you don't inform me about your wellbeing."<br/>
<br/>
Clarke shook her head, exasperated. "Got it. Thanks, uncle Theo."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Murphy cleared his throat, interrupting them. "Well, uncle Theo, let me accompany you to the door."<br/>
<br/>
Jaha arched a brow at him. "I will not take your humor in stride, Mr Murphy, only because you are helping Clarke getting better. Don't make me regret this."<br/>
<br/>
Murphy mock saluted him. "Aye aye, captain."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Her friend came back and plopped on the couch beside her.<br/>
"You are such a dick." She huffed, and Murphy snickered, patting her leg and seating in the armchair he vacated a few minutes prior.<br/>
<br/>
"You know me."<br/>
<br/>
She threw him a cushion in turn, and sat up hugging her legs to her chest. "So, and old lady dancing polka?"<br/>
<br/>
He huffed out a lough. "Ah, so you heard me then."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
She hummed. "I thought I was getting better at this. But every time, I keep falling, again, and again..."<br/>
<br/>
"That's not true Clarke. I think instead that it's perfectly normal for you not to be all right in this moment. It's not an easy situation. It wasn't predictable, although probably I should've handled it differently..."<br/>
<br/>
"It's not your fault Murphy." She murmured.<br/>
<br/>
He shook his head. "Thanks, but in a way, it is. At first, I kept it for me because I thought it wasn't necessary. Why would I want to give you both that pain? You didn't know each other. Then I came back here... and one of the reasons I didn't tell you I was back was this one. Sure, I was pissed about how you felt about my relationship with Emori, but deep down I knew I didn't want to acknowledge the fact that I had to tell you the truth one day."<br/>
<br/>
"Then Bellamy and Octavia showed up." She said sadly.<br/>
<br/>
He nodded, grime. "That they did. Telling you why they decided to drop everything in Polis to come here isn't in my place tough."<br/>
<br/>
"I didn't ask you to."<br/>
<br/>
"I know. Anyway... I thought that having them living under my roof would make my job easier, ya know? And I was so wrong. 'Cause you two had to ruin my plan of easing you into a friendship after I told you everything by meeting on day one. And you didn't even know I was back in town. Well technically you knew, but I was in the dark about that little information." <br/>
<br/>
He threw his hands up. "I was so angry when Bellamy told me he met this gorgeous girl that morning, I knew immediately it was you. And I took it out on him, at first."<br/>
<br/>
Clarke shot him a look. "Yeah, I know this story. More or less."<br/>
<br/>
He cringed. "Not my finest moment I know. I even apologized. Do not interrupt me!" He said, because he knew her that well.<br/>
<br/>
"I just told myself that if I was able to scare him off a little, I would have more time to ease both of you into the situation. Then, hearing him talking about you..."<br/>
<br/>
Always one of the bluntness people she had the luck to have by her side, she knew just with a look that he didn't want to say something that would trigger a bad reaction from her. But he didn't have to, because she knew exactly what he was thinking. "You thought we could heal each other."<br/>
<br/>
He jumped up from the armchair and ploffed down beside her on the couch, nodding along with her. "Uh-uh. Although I hoped to have some more time before the bombshell. You know, it's not something he told me casually over breakfast. It took me to find him drunk out of his mind a few days after she passed for him to tell me. And he wasn't happy about it."<br/>
<br/>
She nodded, sadly. "You know, it's weird. When I first met him, my world kind of shifted on its axis. I could feel it, this deep connection between us. When I found that photo, the other day..."<br/>
<br/>
"I am sorry you found out like that." He said, disappointed.<br/>
<br/>
Clarke shrugged. "It was bound to happen eventually."<br/>
<br/>
She let out a big breath. "My first instinct was to run as fast as I could and don't look back. But then I saw how broken he was. Even if he was trying hard not to show it, it was so clear to me the pain he was going through. So I did something unthinkable for the Clarke I used to be. I stayed. I reassured him. Even if I knew I was about to break, I stayed with him for as long as I could, because the need to make sure he was ok was stronger than all the sorrow I was feeling."<br/>
<br/>
"That's good Clarke. You always let the pain overflow and keep hold of your body and soul. Being able to keep it at bay, even for just a few minutes, it's a step in the right direction. It's a sign that you are healing. You should be proud of that, because I am Griffin."<br/>
<br/>
She shook her head and placed it on his shoulder.<br/>
"You are tougher than you think. We are going to get through this, ok?"<br/>
<br/>
She made a disgruntled noise, but she didn't argue. "Thanks Murph. For being here, for- everything."<br/>
<br/>
"Between cockroaches we have to help each other, right? Oh, and, dispassionate advice Griffin."<br/>
<br/>
She looked up at him expectantly.<br/>
Murphy leveled her with a serious look. "Take a shower. You stink."<br/>
<br/>
Yeah, she did. Three days wrapped in a blanket, moving only to go to the bathroom, in May.<br/>
Ah, was he right. Still, she flipped him off.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Hours later, after sulking a bit more on her couch, she finally dragged herself to take a so much needed shower. Emerging from the bathroom, hair still dump, the first thing Clarke noticed was the beautiful smell of bacon coming from down the hall. After nearly three days of fasting, saying Clarke was hungry was a bit reductive.<br/>
<br/>
The second thing she noticed was music. The third?<br/>
<br/>
Voices.<br/>
<br/>
A lot of voices.<br/>
<br/>
As quietly as possible, Clarke walked down the hall and peered into the living room.<br/>
<br/>
All her family was here, and she wasn't surprised. After nearly three days of ignoring them and on top of that, make them deal with Murphy?<br/>
Yeah, she wasn't surprised, at all. Clarke owed them an explanation, and she wasn't going to chicken out.<br/>
She just needed to fill her stomach, before dropping the bomb on them.<br/>
<br/>
Taking a deep breath to steady herself, Clarke took the final step to enter the living room. Turned out she needn't had to worry. <br/>
<br/>
Without even looking at her, Raven pointed to the kitchen and said "Go eat something Griffin, we don't want you fainting on us."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Smiling to herself, she followed the smell of bacon to the kitchen, where she found Murphy doing his magic at the stove.<br/>
"I think I am spoiling you, these days." He said, placing a plate full of bacon and omelette and one sporting blueberry pancakes in front of her.<br/>
<br/>
She smiled gratefully at him. "You are Murph, tough I am not complaining."<br/>
<br/>
He seated on the other side of the stool and stole a piece of bacon from her plate. "So, the gang is here."<br/>
<br/>
"You don't say." She replied, quirking an eyebrow at him.<br/>
<br/>
"Feeling better, I see." He said, munching.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
When her belly was full and her mind was clearer, she stood up, rounded the counter and enveloped Murphy in a big hug. "Thanks, Murph."<br/>
<br/>
He squeezed her tight. "We'll talk about it later. You ready?"<br/>
<br/>
"As ready as I'll ever be."<br/>
<br/>
"Ok. Let's go then."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Clarke followed Murphy into the living room, and seated in the empty armchair, Murphy, ever the supportive one, settling in the armrest beside her.<br/>
<br/>
She took a minute to study her friends: to her left, Harper and Raven shared the couch with Jasper squeezed in the middle, and Monty on the floor between his girlfriend's legs. Lincoln was seated in the armchair right in front of Clarke, on the other side of the coffee table, Jackson behind him, his arms laying on the headrest.<br/>
<br/>
They were all studying her, trying to assess the situation.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
"Sorry for ghosting you guys." She began.<br/>
<br/>
"We didn't give it much thought, at first." Jackson said, patting Lincoln's head.<br/>
<br/>
Her friend nodded. "Yeah, when Murphy texted me, I thought he ended up at yours 'cause he was too much drunk and you both ended up hungover. Plus, I thought you were trying to escape from Sidney. Don't look at me like that, it was a fair guess. But then Murphy asked if I could cover for you at the school. And that was weird."<br/>
<br/>
"Then Murphy said he took the same bug as you and he needed to recover at yours?" Harper said, her eyebrows to her hairline.<br/>
<br/>
Raven let out a dry laugh. "Yeah, that was bullshit and at that point it was clear as day."<br/>
<br/>
Jasper fidgeted. "Yeah, we tried to give you some space, but three days Clarkey? Not even Murphy threatening us could keep us away from you that long."<br/>
<br/>
All her friends nodded.<br/>
Monty placed a hand on her thigh and squeezed softly. "We are just here to make sure you are ok, tough. You don't have to say anything. We just, we were worried. And we missed you."<br/>
<br/>
Again her friends nodded along with the words recently spoken.<br/>
Clarke gave them a grateful smile.<br/>
<br/>
She didn't know what at all her friends were expecting, but certainly not what she was about to say.<br/>
For that reason, Clarke was unsure about how to broach the argument. But in the end, she decided it was futile to go around the news in tiptoes, she just had to let it out.<br/>
<br/>
Suddenly uncomfortable, Clarke repositioned herself in the armchair with her legs crossed under her. Then, she took a deep breath and straightened her back, interlocking her hands in her lap. <br/>
<br/>
Just as she was about to speak, Jasper started talking. "I've been thinking about this."<br/>
<br/>
Everyone except Clarke groaned.<br/>
"No, hear me out! We know for a fact that she's been ignoring everyone, and for everyone I mean Bellamy specifically. And, I thought you two were getting along Clarkey." He whined. "We haven't seen you this happy in a long time, you seemed so comfortable and at ease with him, we were so excited for you. And I know everyone agrees because we talked about this."<br/>
<br/>
At that, they all started speaking on top of each other.<br/>
"Well, maybe if you let her time to speak Jasper-" was saying Jackson.<br/>
<br/>
"You really couldn't wait five minutes?" Lincoln added, shaking his head disapprovingly.<br/>
<br/>
And Harper. "We talked about this Jasper, you agreed to-"<br/>
<br/>
"Wait until she was ready to talk!!!" Raven said, going along on Harper's line of thought.<br/>
<br/>
"I am only saying that guy is loosing is fucking mind-"<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Clarke was watching it all happen around her, unable to put an end to it.<br/>
<br/>
The only person aside from her and Murphy who wasn't taking part in the debate was Monty, who kept looking at her, still patting her thigh comfortingly.<br/>
Murphy leaned in to whisper in her ear. "If you aren't going to quiet them, I am going to throw them all out."<br/>
<br/>
She looked at him, and he quirked an eyebrow at her defiantly. Then, is expression changed to one of reassurance. He squeezed her arm and murmured, "Just let it out. Don't overthink it."<br/>
<br/>
And that she did. Nodding to Murphy, but mostly to herself, she turned to face the rest of her friends, cleared her throat, and with a confidence that she leaked in the last few days she said, "Bellamy and Octavia's mother was Aurora Blake."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
The effect of her words was instantaneous.<br/>
They all froze in their spots, effectively stopping their rumbling.<br/>
<br/>
Silently, she watched as her friends absorbed the news.<br/>
<br/>
The reaction in them was almost imperceptible, as always trying to protect her, but she could read them all like old books.<br/>
Harper's hands stopped their ministrations of waving into Monty's hair and gripped them with more force than necessary, if the grimace Monty made was any indication. Jasper started occasionally biting his nails, freaking out internally she was sure, to the point where both Harper and Raven took one of his hands in their own to make him stop. Lincoln, stoic as ever, brought his hands in his lap and locked them tightly into fists, while Raven's eye started ticking minutely. Jackson's face fell, and he came to sit on the floor in front of the TV, placing his arms on the coffee table and shaking his head.<br/>
<br/>
It seemed neither one of her friends knew what to reply to that.<br/>
<br/>
After some moments of tension and uncertainty, it was Raven that broke the silence, because of course she was.<br/>
She cocked an eyebrow at her. "Was?"<br/>
<br/>
Clarke nodded. "She passed. Tough I didn't have the lucidity to stay and ask him when, or how. I just freaked out and ran away before he could notice."<br/>
<br/>
"Well, that explains a lot of things." Jackson stated, blowing out a breath.<br/>
<br/>
"Yeah," interjected Jasper, "as in Murphy not wanting for you to take them home, you dropping out the face of the earth for days, Bellamy asking repeatedly about you-"<br/>
<br/>
"Enough, Jas." Intervened Monty.<br/>
<br/>
Clarke let out a breath. "I know you guys weren't expecting this. It's unbelievable, and sad, and - messy. But let me be clear about this: I don't want my problems to interfere with what life brought us in these last few weeks, or just the other day." She said, sending looks to Jasper and Jackson.<br/>
<br/>
Then she continued. "We met some beautiful people, and we gave life to a new group that works so well together. I should be surprised at how good we mold with each other, but reality is, I am really not. Seeing the way you are with each other... For a reason still unknown to me, it was meant to be. So yeah, that goes for you too, Linc. Octavia, she is perfect for you. And for the gallery. Don't let my messy life get in the middle of that."<br/>
<br/>
"I don't know..."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Clarke could see the indecision in her friend's eyes, Lincoln's hands locked tightly in his lap, so she continued. "I mean it. I won't let what I found out condition my relationship with our new friends and I don't want you to either. Not Bellamy, not Octavia and everyone else. Don't shut them out on the account of protecting or being faithful to me. None of that. That's a thing between me and them... And a thing they have to hear from me."<br/>
<br/>
She stared at each one of them, growing agitated, eyes pleading. "I know I am putting you in a difficult situation and I am sorry. For asking you to lie for me, and to go on with your lives as if you don't know anything. But I don't want to keep you guys in the dark. And I need to do this without feeling pressured, and without the fear of being rejected."<br/>
<br/>
Monty touched her leg briefly to get her attention. "Clarke, what happened to your hands? Your fingers are all red and scraped."<br/>
<br/>
Shame washed through her in an instant. Instinctively, she hid her hands under her thighs.<br/>
It clicked for them almost too quickly.<br/>
<br/>
It was true that her friends were used to seeing her at her worst. That didn't mean every time it would get any easier.<br/>
"Clarke, that's not good-" Raven argued.<br/>
<br/>
"Here let me take a look-" Interjected Jackson.<br/>
<br/>
She stood, unable to take it anymore.<br/>
They all quietened. "I am sorry I am not as strong as you guys want me to be. Just- just let me figure things out. I'll be back to my old self in no time and you won't have to worry about me anymore."<br/>
<br/>
Raven's eyes softened. "Babe, we-" <br/>
<br/>
"Leave this part to me, uh?" Interjected Murphy, and no one had anything to object to that, not even Raven. <br/>
<br/>
Murphy was there for her more than anyone else.<br/>
<br/>
She directed a grateful smile at him and addressed her friends. "Thanks, guys, for being here. Stay as long as you want. I am sorry for making you worry and for being - the worse side of me at the moment. 'Night."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Without giving them time to reply, Clarke started for her room, Murphy hot on her heels.<br/>
<br/>
"We have to do this now?" She said, keeping busy, trying to hold her tears at bay.<br/>
<br/>
"Oh, we have." He replied, shutting the door.<br/>
<br/>
"I meant what I said in the living room." She huffed out, moving clothes at a random.<br/>
<br/>
He cocked an eyebrow at her. "That doesn't make things easier."<br/>
<br/>
"I'll try." She said, weakly, moving to retreat to the bathroom, but stopping as soon as she saw Murphy following her. <br/>
<br/>
"Again, easier said than done."<br/>
<br/>
"I told you Murphy, I am not going to-"<br/>
<br/>
But he cut her off, taking her shoulders in his hands, effectively stooping her from slipping away and not facing him. "Clarke, you can put all your will into it, but if your heart and your head aren't on the same page we are talking about nothing. The point here is: all this pain you are feeling is preventing you to be with him? What happened with his mother years ago, is something you can't put aside to be with him, and to be friends with his sister?"<br/>
<br/>
Clarke took a step back, colliding with her closet and shrinking into herself, defeated. <br/>
She sat there, lost in her head, Murphy staring at her carefully. In the end, it wasn't that hard to decide. So shook her head vehemently, talking firmly.  "It's not their fault, either. I'm not going to shut them out of my life for something that was out of their control. For- for something that broke them too."<br/>
<br/>
She sniffled, shrugging. "I just have to sulk a little more before getting my shit together. You know, my coping mechanism kind of sucks."<br/>
<br/>
He stared at her, pleased and unimpressed at the same time. "Don't I know it."<br/>
<br/>
She shook her head, trying to change the subject. "Isn't it time for you to go back to your life? You know, working, badly flirting with my best friend-"<br/>
<br/>
Murphy smirked. "Yeah, If I could, I would flirt with myself too."<br/>
<br/>
"My other best friend, idiot."<br/>
<br/>
"Wow, you really are feeling better." He said, smiling at last.<br/>
<br/>
She let out a long breath and shot him a hopeful look. "I am trying. Besides, it's easy to take it out on you."<br/>
<br/>
"Well, you can use me as a punching bag whenever you want. Just don't tell anyone that I am secretly a softie, it would ruin my image."<br/>
<br/>
"How would I? Your secret is safe with me." She winked.<br/>
<br/>
He ruffled her hair. "Go to bed. And yes, tomorrow night I am going back to work. Besides, Jackson has the night off, so he said he could take over for me."<br/>
<br/>
"I am not a lost puppy Murphy." She fought, but when he went to return to their friends, she took his hand and gave him a pleading look.<br/>
<br/>
Murphy turned and gave her a reassuring smile. "I am just going to bring here my beanbag and kick them out. Don't worry."<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
After a tight hug, Murphy retreated to the living room and Clarke let herself fall on the bed, exhaustion overtaking her immediately.<br/>
With the soft voices of her friends serving as a warm background noise, Clarke let herself finally succumb to sleep.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
When she woke up the next morning, she felt oppressed in a good sort of way, and she soon realized why: opening her eyes Clarke found she was sandwiched by Harper and Raven, both of the girls arms around her waist, engulfing her completely, Harper snoring lightly in her ear. Lifting her head and looking around the room, she found Jasper curled at their feet, Murphy finally sprawled on his beanbag and, on the side of the room, Lincoln, Jackson and Monty all stretched on her wide rug sharing two pillows. <br/>
<br/>
A light breeze came in from the open window, and she thanked the heavens for that.<br/>
<br/>
Clarke was sweaty, and sticky, but she didn't care one bit. Her heart swelled in her chest at the sight of her friends. She was so grateful and proud of her family.<br/>
<br/>
Her hands itched to put the image on paper. For the moment tough, she was satisfied to fix it in her memory.<br/>
<br/>
She dozed some more, until she couldn't ignore the pressure on her bladder anymore.<br/>
<br/>
Extricating herself from her friends grip without waking them was a struggle, but she made it.<br/>
In the bathroom, she took the time to wash her face and teeth, before deciding to make a beeline for the kitchen to start some coffee.<br/>
<br/>
Her hopes where short-lived tough, because as soon as she put foot out of the bathroom, Harper mumbled "Whatcha doin, come back here."<br/>
<br/>
And who was she to turn down some snuggle time with her family?<br/>
<br/>
Jasper wasted no time, hugging her feet and using them as a pillow. "We don't need your old self. We just want you to be ok Clarkey." He yawned.<br/>
<br/>
"Yeah, Griffin. We love the hot mess you are." Proclaimed Raven kissing her cheek loudly, earning grunts and general approvals from the others.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
After nearly three days of feeling empty and dull, Clarke let out a light laugh, tears in her eyes.<br/>
All her friends beamed at her.<br/>
<br/>
"I love you guys." She said, voice thick.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
They started filling her in on what she missed in the last few days and she limited to nodding along and offering a few remarks when she felt like it.<br/>
They knew not to push her for more. <br/>
<br/>
At one point, she started to tune them out, focusing on her thoughts.<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
<br/>
Clarke knew what she wanted.<br/>
<br/>
And she wanted Bellamy. To know him deeply, learn everything about him, to be with him.<br/>
<br/>
It was going to take time, and it wasn't going to be easy, but she was willing to let go of her past to be with him.</p>
<p></p><div>
  <p> </p>
</div><div>
  <p>The question was: will Bellamy be able to do the same?</p>
</div>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Warning: panic attacks</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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